Thanks for your replies. They're very reassuring. I guess the reason I feel torn is because on the one hand I have seen where we end up if a skip is unsuccessful and I never want dd to have to feel that way again (I should stress that the work was still under her level despite it being a grade 1/2 composite and the main problem was that lack of support and an incredibly chaotic classroom). On the other hand and I read a post on this here recently, we've kind of entered a phase of grey. She's happy enough to go to school, but isn't really learning anything (other than how school works, which I do feel is important to my rule focussed girl) and that seems ok to me for the rest of the year (our school year finishes in December). She's building her confidence back up and so on.
What she's not doing is showing any interest in the kids from school outside of school, which is very unlike her and she's just playing with random kids each day (she'd rather watch paint dry with someone, anyone, than hang around on her own). She's also, as I mentioned starting to show some signs of her perfectionism increasing. So the not learning, no real social connections (though it is a lovely group of kids) and the increase in perfectionism are all red flags to me. I guess I feel that 6 months more is fine, 18 months more might be a problem. The teacher says there is a another girl in the class at the same level as dd and I think she's using this girl as the bar for where dd should be at. I spend a bit of time in the classroom and she's right, this girl is a bright high achiever, but she's not at the same level as dd. I have met the girls family and they're very focused on academics, which we're not (the maths dd does at home is because she loves it - she does maths rather than reads before she goes to bed and we don't really do anything formally). The teacher wouldn't necessarily know though because dd just does as she's told. That is my other concern, dd will perform to exactly the level expected of her, which makes it hard because it means the teacher never sees more and therefore doesn't expect more.
But I'm very reluctant to skip without dd being on board. I am also feeling unsure that not skipping is not going to have other ramifications. Sigh...
Lucounu, DH and I have thought about home schooling on and off, but DH especially is against it. The other issue for me is that I don't feel remotely equipped to do it. School for me was somewhat of a disaster and if I'm honest, I'm learning aspects of grade three/four maths right along side dd. Not sure that would make for an ideal home schooling situation!
Perhaps I'll leave it for another term with gentle nudges to the teacher for harder work and see where we are at that point.
Last edited by Kvmum; 06/14/11 02:04 PM.
