Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Free reing on electronics for two year old

My little 2.5 DD has figured out the mouse on the computer... She has her own computer since she has had a fascination with them and Uncle is a computer geek so he made her one. She also can pick out her own movies and either play them on her computer or on the T.V. I am giving her free reign at this time. She seems pretty balanced on her own initiative. She loves Starfall and Lions to Go. She also likes to take a blank page and type words such as her name, her sister's name etc. She also has a hand me down IPOD. She usually only had access to the IPOD on the long car trips that are daily due to where I live. In the morning she is watching about 20 minutes of a dvd - something like Letter Factory or Word Factory or signing and again in the evening usually while I am making dinner. She plays on the computer on and off. She also does a lot of imaginative play with plastic animals and people. She loves to play with a tea set. So it seems ok. She is probably doing around 1 1/2 hours of electronics per day.... a lot of which happen in the car. More than my ideal idea of raising a child. It seems that she can do things with the computer that her hands will not allow yet..such as writing the letters. I'm just wondering what others think and any advice from experience.

That's great! At that age my son started playing computer games that developed his mouse, reading and typing skills. IIRC one of his faves back then was Zoo Tycoon. He loved letting the lions out of their pen... Today he loves all kind of stuff, but he's hooked lately on doing his Lego Mindstorms and playing Nethack.

I think one nice product that might be helpful for the very young is keyboard stickers. You can get them in lower case, color-coded to learn typing, in alternate character sets, etc. My son found his keyboard much easier to use with lower-case letters, when he started. Now, at five, he is in the beginnings of touch typing with no teaching. He somehow naturally adopted the right hand position and everything; I don't know if it's from watching us.

Another thing that might encourage her is to have a right-sized mouse. There are lots of options for little hands, due to mini-mouses made for laptops, plus options inteded just for kids. If you live near a Staples or similar store, you can probably try them before you buy.

If she's online, make sure you have net-nanny software installed, even if you think you're always watching and could prevent a mishap. (Sorry; it is probably already on your radar.)

For my son, with his perfectionism that I totally didn't recognise, let him to shy away from the small motor tasks that are so important to hand development. But he would have a fit about not wanting to make 'art' and 'demand' to sit in my lap and have me do the art while he described it. So eventually I just sat him in front of Microsoft Paint and let him do it on there. He would sit for hours with the maginfing glass going pixel by pixel to get it right. Little did I know that he was 'supposed' to be pouring that determination into fine motor control with a crayon.

He did, eventually, catch up, but a lot was missed.

So knowing what might happen, I wouldn't really worry about it, particularly the 'in car' time, just that at the first sign of her not wanting to use her little hands, to be vigilent about taking the electronics away if she goes that route.

I'm much more wary of electronics for boys - but maybe that is old fashioned.
((Shrugs))
Grinity

I just posted about this on another thread! My DS 5 didn't do it on the computer instead made it all verbal. I am not sure what I was supposed to have done to "ensure" he use the crayons, but mine also chose other avenues and it has an affect. I don't think there is a problem per se with electronics, DS loved starfall. But my lack of interest in cleaning paint led to a kid who just doesn't do it. I allowed him to avoid learning to do something which now created an asynchrony which frustrates him. Not that a 5 yr old should have the writing capability which matches his way out there verbal and science comprehension, but to be so far off from his other skills upsets him. So seconding Grinity here, in and of itself I don't think it's a problem but when electronics, or reading or anything else is so dominant that the fine motor isn't getting enough attention I would say put some limits on it.

The other thing I would say is that watching a lot for some reason leads to more proscribed play, if it's character driven, like the sites which go to tv shows. Personally I find kids that get super into the characters seem to allow the characters and their rules and setting control their play. I like to see the play as an amalgam of all their inputs
not dominated by one source. Not sure if this is true across the board but it seems to be.

DeHe.

I don't remember number of hours/day that we allowed our son at that age, but he has always had mostly unrestricted access. We ended up getting him a netbook when he was almost 4 because at that time he was wanting to use my computer frequently enough that we had to compete. Now he's been getting back on mine again because he likes to print out maps and sports logos and the latest is that he has asked for his own printer.

I do tend to be a bit more wary of TV time rather than computer use, which might be a personal bias, but I don't think it's as interactive and doesn't allow them to pursue their own interests as easily. That having been said, guess where my kids are right now? LOL

If you're concerned that there's too much electronic usage, which I'm guessing you may since you're posting this question, I'd suggest you see if you can cut back on what she's doing in the car and instead listen to music or sing together, play I Spy or the Alphabet Game or something like that instead.

Thank-you for your thoughtful replies. This little girl is sooo different than my other one. My other one was potty trained, dressing herself, painting all over the place, drawing etc. by this age. This little one has been diagnosed mildly hypo-tonic. We did PT for quite awhile and then I just did not like the therapists and their interference with parenting and their kind of punitive style. OT was suggested as well but the OT was the worst for the punitive style and one time with her was more than enough. We have been attending gymnastic classes and open gym to help increase muscle tone and coordination. I had to bribe her to try and get her socks off. She has no interest in doing this kind of stuff. I do some painting with her but she is not that interested. She is obsessed with letters and at times numbers. So I got some big wooden ones for her to paint. That held her attention a bit longer. Then I got letter stencils and markers and that held for a few minutes. The signing videos, she signs along with them so I hope that is helping. We got an easel with chalk but that has fleeting interest. I thought the mouse would help her develop fine motor skills since she has to move it around and then click...but maybe this is wrong?

Sounds like you are trying really hard, but that she is up against some strong challenges. I would try finding other OTs and PTs that are more in line with your ideas of what human beings should be like. These are just very valuable years that I wouldn't settle for DIY unless it was the only choice.

It's probably literally true that the mouse is somewhat helpful, but I think especially dangerous in other ways in your particular situation, reminds me of an analogy that I can't use here, but once one gets used to the powerful stimulation of electronics, then old fashioned analog stimulations seems even less appealing.

I would encourage looking up some threads about Nurtured Heart Approach and Howard Glasser /Transforming the Difficult Child, because this challenge calls for some 'super-advanced' parenting.

Love and More Love,
Grinty

Putting shaving cream on a window or door and having her write/draw in the cream with her finger is a fun way to practice without having to hold a pencil. Not too bad to clean up, but does leave a greasy film on the glass!

My son's OT suggested this, and he loved it.

Grinity - I got you on what your saying! You did a very good job of saying it here! The Nurtured Heart books arrived in the mail a day or two ago. Loved the analogy of being the personal entertainment system...Hubby and I had a good laugh with that one. I am tentative about PT or OT as I do feel at the end the PT did more damage and it was a very painful experience for both of us. I do have a friend who is currently trying to find the name of the OT she used and liked.

Verona - This sounds like fun...In the shower/bath may make clean-up even easier!

Whew! I sure hope I'm not starting a trend, but it was the best analogy I could think of -
Glad to hear that you are trying to track down an OT. I would say that you should go and meet the person before you bring your DD - and with the NHA hopefully your DD will be more practiced in 'handling her strong feelings well' by the time she meets the next OT or PT. For OTs you might try looking for one that is trained in 'Sensory Integration Disorder' but really, it's the person, not the label.

You might enjoy this book:
The Out-of-Sync Child Has Fun, Revised Edition: Activities for Kids with Sensory Processing Disorder by Carol Kranowitz

It's full of ideas for how to do therapy at home in a fun way.

But I still want you to have the help of an OT, even if you can only find one over skype to give you guidance.

Love and More Love,
Grinity