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    Joined: Aug 2010
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    DeHe Offline OP
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    Hi
    I'm looking for some advice. DS took WPSSI over the summer at 4.5, he just took SB5 for school testing, and there was a huge disparity between the two, from 2 different pyschs. I posted how upset I was when we got the SB scores because we let him take the test with what we thought was a cold rather than postponing and it turned out to be a very bad ear infection with fever 5 hours after the test. Obviously huge mistake,but we didn't know how it affected the testing until we met today with the psych.

    She basically validated his WPSSI scores, and that the SB score was not a reflection of his skills, which sucks because this was a one shot admissions opportunity. Basically his strengths and weaknesses are the same on both tests, huge, huge verbal, not as strong visual, but did much much better on WPSSI, on the SB she said he gave up repeatedly . She very interestingly said there was a question early on (which she would not identify) which most kids don't get which he got easily and immediately but then on the later subtests refused to do it or started doing some of it, in his own way, like making up his own relationships between pictures, which he knew wasn't what she was looking for but he didn't care.

    So here's the issue (sorry so long to get to the point smile ) the way the illness affected him relates to his personality, he was no longer interested or was tired so he didn't answer the questions, or didn't answer correctly when the tester said she knew he knew it based on earlier responses. He opted out, politely and friendly, no overt resistance, but resistance nonetheless. We need him to take one more set of tests for other school options, since this is no longer an option. I don't think he is optimally gifted, meaning he will not get enough from regular gifted or pullouts. I think he needs at minimum to be in a full-scale gifted program and in some of his learning areas I don't think it will even be enough, although other areas it would be fine. And don't get me started socially, he needs to be with kids a bit more like him. But to get some of the services which are at least available to him, he needs to test and test well. But it's not like he needs to be prepped, he Can answer the questions correctly, he was choosing not to, granted because he was 4 and was sick, but let's face it, also because he could. So without going into a long diatribe about having to test a 4 year old to get him what he needs which is obvious 15 minutes after talking to him, what do we do?

    I certainly don't want to say to him, you need to perform on this test else you will then be bored 7 hours a day for several years! With the WPSSI we said it was a brain check up, (he liked that idea) this pysch mentioned special school stuff. But he has asked about school and the tests, so I said he has to do one more which will be with a teacher to find the right school for him to go to. He seemed okay with that. But what to say about doing his best? He will be 5 at that point but he is still little, I certainly don't want to pressure him but If he shows them what he is capable of he should get in to a reasonably appropriate gifted program. I feel like I put him in a bad position with the SB5 but at the same time, DH pointed out the behavior pattern was his pattern when he doesn't want to do something. So while I think he wouldn't have opted out if not sick, I don't know that completely. So how to talk to him about not doing this again. This isn't about prepping him for a score but keeping him doing it until it's done. The pysch suggested asking him to focus, and to give your best answer even if it seems easy or hard.

    Any thoughts? I feel like I could say to him, this is important, please be focused, listen to the teacher, etc. But that seems to fly in the face of normal recommendations to not pressure.

    Thanks!

    DeHe

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    Well, DeHe, the stakes are pretty high.

    Depending on his personality, perhaps you can playact with stuffed animals and have them act out taking the test. One can be sick, and just feel like giving up. One can know the answers but be sneaky or afraid of what will happen if the grown up finds out how much he knows. One can be unsure, but with support be encouraged to guess. One can confidently answer the questions, assuredly handling that there will be some questions that are too easy and some that are too hard.

    Then you can have a little party for the ones who act right and they can go to a new school the features lots of hard books and hard math problems, while the sneaky and tired kid go to a school where they have to do work he already knows how to do.

    If stuffed animals are too babyish or too unreal, perhaps he could create a 'public service anouncement' powerpoint for kids who need to take this sort of test about why testing is needed and pointers?

    Somehow, acting it out seems 'less pressure-y' than giving a lecture. This way he can draw his own conclusions - you are just providing the information.

    Best Wishes,
    Grinity


    Coaching available, at SchoolSuccessSolutions.com
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    DeHe Offline OP
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    Thanks G - for both the understanding that its important but also for the ideas!

    Interestingly, in our house certain stuffed animals are full on imaginary friends but in conversation or in DS's head, not actually with the animals, except to cart them around. But he doesn't prop them up like dolls. So we might be able to have a conversation - sort of What Would - insert animal name Do for school and testing in his town (he has a whole land, complete with transit system!)

    The explaining it to others is a good one too, except he might actually try to do it - not sure what kind of conversation it would produce with other parents if he went around in preschool telling them how to handle the upcoming testing LOL!

    I suppose this is a good lesson for me for later - all I can do is put him in position to achieve, I can't do it for him. On the other hand, if there was ever a time for the parents to be more in control it should be when choosing a school for a 5 year old!!!

    DeHe

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    I don't think there's anything wrong with a gentle coaching. You don't have to say "this is all doom and gloom buddy if you screw this up!"

    We said something like "This person is going to write a report to help your teacher know how you learn best and what kinds of stuff you're ready to learn. It's really important that you do your best and don't try to trick the person. She doesn't know you very well so she won't know if you're messing around or being funny. So just give her your best information and Daddy and I will do the rest."

    DS took it seriously but didn't have anxiety. He just wanted to get some info to his teacher so she'd finally understand he was bored. He was also 5 when he took the SB5. Because it has no timed sections, I think that took a lot of pressure off and he was very relaxed and just did his thing!


    Last edited by CAMom; 12/10/10 08:06 AM.
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    DeHe Offline OP
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    Originally Posted by CAMom
    It's really important that you do your best and don't try to trick the person. She doesn't know you very well so she won't know if you're messing around or being funny. So just give her your best information and Daddy and I will do the rest."

    CAMom,
    thanks! that is perfect - the she doesn't know you well part - so even if you don't really want to do anymore, you still need to because she needs all your best information. Love it!

    The don't screw it up part is so tough, because I do know he's 4 but I also know what he can do!

    DeHe


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