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I know what you mean by being so happy with having a choice, onthegomom. It's almost like having a second chance at somethng that's going horribly.

I'm crossing my fingers about our situation as well. DS7 has been in school for 4.5mths, and it's been unbearable for him till the last several weeks when all the changes clicked into place. The first three months was all about waiting for the grade skip that was promised. Then DS bombed the math placement test (he aced a similar one about 9mths earlier) and the grade skip promise was rescinded. Plus his handwriting is very poor and he is, to paraphrase the gifted officer, "socially backward". Fine, that's their opinion. But we're still left with a problem - he just doesn't fit in. His teacher couldn't believe the results of the test, which is why she's so willing to help out. She even suggested taking time out from school for the external math class, for which I am grateful.

Come the meeting, I believe she'll reiterate her views - that he doesn't belong in her Grade 1 class (our school year runs from Jan to Dec). My hopes for another placement test are ebbing, since realistically, grade skips are extremely rare (less than 10 skips in the last 10 years across 150 schools) here. These days though, I've become very short term focused - I just want to fix the issues year by year, keep him happy and learning for as long as I can, and hope that a longer term solution will eventually out itself.

Good luck to all of us in similar circumstances!

Great post, MON! Right on the money!

I have come to accept that no solution is ever long-term for my kids. We revisit every 6 months or year. We've been pretty lucky with what we're doing for DS8. We've tweaked things, but the basics have been the same for 18 months, and the same basics will continue next year. I'm kind of amazed that it's still working. But we're making a big change for DS5 for next year. I'm very nervous about it, but I am reassured by the fact that we have other options if the new arrangements are a flop. One way or another, it will be fine.

To everyone: I'd recommend doing your best to avoid putting more pressure on yourself than you have to when it comes to school decisions. I know that's harder than it sounds, but the truth is that almost no educational choice that you make is irreversible. If something doesn't work, you can shift gears.

One of the main reasons I recommend that people look into all the options available to them (public schools, private schools, dual enrollment, full-time homeschooling, etc.) is because knowing that what you child is doing now is NOT the only possibility gives a parent courage to stand up. The perception that all the power is in the hands of the school administration is gone. One can choose to leave the table and go elsewhere. Even if you don't go elsewhere, that confidence is handy!

I'll also say that kids are very resiliant. That doesn't mean that they should suffer for years in a bad situation. But it does mean that they can weather a storm or two and still come out happy and healthy. One bad year is not the end of the worls, provided you're doing what you can to make it better.

Do the best you can, lean on people who can help you, and forgive yourself your mistakes. It's all any of us can do.

Great advice everyone! We are moving forward in exploring a new (closer) GT school against my kids wishes. I am a basketcase over it all and thankful my husband looks at things much more logically than I do!

I know there are so many things that have to happen before we need to actually make this decision. But as usual I can't just let it go until then:)

It helped to read the previous posts that reminded me:
- Parents have to do what works for them too
- GT kids are on a school journey that might require changes every year or so.

Now I just have to keep repeating that every day for the next month or so!

Tks Kriston. Yes, spiritedmama, I too have become a total nut when I think of the next meeting, *faint*. Trawling these pages have been so helpful - I never would have dreamed that I could offer suggestions for accommodation, let alone have them accepted by the school. It was a post from this forum that set me thinking.

I'll be copying from Master of None's post - I'm with my son daily, and his teacher is too (well nearly). We have some idea of what he needs and are giving it to him. In fact, he's allowed to join the external competitive math prep class purely on merit (I'll get his teacher there to write something). The Gifted Board has other ideas after one or two meetings with DS that I don't feel I have the energy to change. But I hope they'll let the people who have a a closer working relationship with him to continue helping him out.

And yes, I like it that we have homeschooling options. DS is begging for it actually, although DH is against the idea. But now, I KNOW that I can't do worse than the school .

Well, I had discussions with both kids indivually about changing schools. I let them know I would take the next few months to think about it and then decide what was best for our family. Both kids remained calm and didn't complain or get upset. This might just be ok. Still need DD's testing to qualify and a new car to actually make it there and a job. I may substitute teach. This is a few too many changes at once but I'm excited.

DS6 is moving schools in August. He didn't want to at all, but we kept it very real for him. While we didn't tell him the EXACT reasons we were moving (financial), we talked about the exciting aspects of moving to a new school and encouraged him to ask for numbers or email addresses of the friends he would like to continue to keep in contact with. I think the fact that he did a grade skip this year (against leaving K at first) helped him realize that change is ok, and he can adapt and make new friends, etc...

I will say, as someone who was uprooted at 14, do it now and don't wait until the teenage years (especially for girls). Though modern technology makes things easier nowadays, I thought the end of the world was coming. It made for a very rough transition.

Oh and Good Luck!!!

I hope it works out well for you, onthegomom! Keep us updated.

I'm starting to get excited about the new GT school we are moving to. I feel more connected to the parents.

I volunteered to clean one day. I was surprized my son took the choice to go visit too. WOW did that feel good to me! He was a little shy but did fine.

DD7 is getting upset about the new school. I had to buy her new school uniforms and she gets upset about them. I hope I can get her at school one day with her to be more familiar. I think she will be ok. I'm also going to try and get her a playdate with someone who will be in her class.

Anybody have more ideas about helping her feel more relaxed about this big change?

I think she gets the learning improvements. She is just sad about leaving her school.

The good news is I found out my kids can continue to do sports at the old school but DD has to wait a year.