Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Age or Ability Specific Forums Toddlers

I'm looking for some advice, just to help my brain stew better. I though this toddler section seemed appropriate.
My DS3 is in a homebased head start program (for those who don't knowthat program, his teacher comes to teach him at our house once a week, and he goes to class an additional 2 times a month for socialization). I was excited at first because his first teacher seemed excited about his abilities and started talking to a first and second grade teacher to find activities appropriate for him. Unfortunately DS only got to meet with her like once i think. Then she got transferred to another area. So he has this new teacher, who is very nice, but I'm just not happy with her. I'd feel the time spent with her is a waste of time except, DS23mo gets to participate, and It is very enjoyable to him, and if not for DS3. DS23mo wouldn't have the opprtunity to have that learning situation. Anyway my frustration is that his teacher is fully aware that he can read early readers, and knew his colors, shapes, letters, since 19 mo or earlier, (letter sounds 20mo), can recognize numbers to 100 (at least), and can count to 49 without help, yet she still asks him bogus questions like asking him what #1 is or having him tell her his colors, and having him match letters. She even brings these dumb board books and has me read them to him about numbers 1-4, or 1-10. I haven' t said anything because she so nice. I think she is just teaching the lesson plan she teaches to all the kids.I believe she does try to make it a little more advance and often skips things that are far under his ablility , but it still isn't helpful. DS 23 months loves this time though. So I keep thinking about quitting the program, but its so nice for DS23mo. Also DS3 does get good motor skills practice which he needs (cutting, sewing cards, drawing), he also does enjoy the socializations days and has a best buddy there who's 5. (i wish so bad for DS to go on to kindergarden with this boy, though im not sure if it would be good..and DS3's teacher has told me how impossible that would be from what she's seen (though i may still try if it he seems ready enough later....i just worry about motor skills and maturity)
Anyway.. my posts are always so unorganized ...and more like thinking out loud, so i hope you understand what i'm trying to say. I'm just not sure what i should do about the teaching situation, or if I should say something. I guess I should, but I'm not sure what I should do and say about it. I just keep hoping it will get better as she gets to know him more. Meanwhile its good for DS23mo....whats your input?

-Jenafur

Jenafur,

It seems like the preschool program has some value to him at least motor skills and social. Also, it allows your DS2 to participate at home which is good for him. Maybe if you supplement your own instruction until DS has some testing done of his abilities? I know it must be difficult to get the level of instruction your DS needs, I was so oblivious to DD's giftedness that I just went along the regular curriculum and she read and learned on her own.

It would be fine though to speak with the teacher when she comes to your house about what the other teacher had intended for your DS. You can give examples of his abilities, and let her decide what she is comfortable with. If nothing happens with that, you can supplement at home during the days he is not at preschool.

What are your goals for the Head Start program and your DS3? (I'm leaving aside for the moment the help it's giving your DS2, since that isn't the goal for the program.)

I think your goals for DS3 are important to consider, because if the program isn't meeting your goals, and you want to keep using the program, then something ought to change.

Do you think the below-skill-level stuff the teacher is giving DS3 is harming him? Making him dislike the work? Dislike her? Feel like he knows everything there is to know already? If you said "yes" to any of these questions, then I'd say something needs to be done sooner rather than later. A talk with the teacher should be your first step, and you should talk to her soon! If that doesn't cut it, then you might need to advocate with the head of the program.

OTOH, if you said "no" to all of these questions and instead you just think the Head Start work is not as challenging as it could be, then it sounds to me like your DS3 is getting enough out of the program to make it worth continuing. Talk to the teacher if it feels comfortable to do, but don't make a big stink about it. You can always supplement the program on your own time with material that is challenging enough for your DS3...and let the Head Start stuff be more for DS2! Do what works!

Mommy2myEm - that is so funny how the boy and girl dynamics cross! I somewhat regularly find DS7 engaged in a war between DD3's calico critters. Or a tornado or hurricane has attacked their house. The horror! DD3 regularly arms herself with a lightsaber (the closest thing we allow to a weapon in the house) while wearing princess dresses. DS7 was also stomping around in DD3's dress up shoes the other day.

My DS was exactly the same with the fine motor stuff. Kindergarten really was great for him for fine motor skills. Once it clicked, he took off.

I have a friend with a DD5 who is an oldest. She's really excited about academics, very high energy, etc. She has a DS3 and she worries about him because he doesn't laugh with glee over alphabet games, writing, etc like her daughter was at 3. We were with them one day, and this little guy identified the make of a pick up truck and the fact that it had 2 gas tanks at 100+ feet along with plenty of other technical details. Umm ... yeah - I wouldn't worry about him! They are just really wired differently.

And Jenafur - boys are so fun! When I was pregnant with #2, I really thought it would be so much fun to have 2 little boys running around.

OH it is very fun! I had no idea I'd love it so much. They are almost like twins, they do everything together!
I just have this yearning in me to have a little girl also...: )

My experience with newborn and toddler. I had one of those strollers where the carseat fit into it. And the baby faced you. At 2 months we were out and she got very fussy and I couldn't get her to settle down, when I picked her up, she just looked around. I realized, eventually, she had to look. Now I am away from home with a 2 month old with this stroller. I had to put her on her belly, and then hold her with my hand, since she wasn't strapped in, so she could see where we were going. And I had to drag the stroller.

We were at the Harvard/Yale game a couple of weeks later. You think this is a place of giftedness. I lasted at the game for the photo op with her dad, then headed to the Charles Hotel to breast feed and wait for everyone post game. The bar is full and I went up to get some Perrier, and older women kept coming up to me about my daughter watching everyone in the room. I really didn't understand. Yes, she is watching? They mentioned the intensity of her gaze.

She rolled early, I do not know when, but she used it very early to get to places. I joined a mothers' group. We sat on a carpeted floor. As soon as I sat down and was getting comfortable, DD rolled across the circle to see who was on the other side -- 4 months.

She walked when she turned 11 months. almost to the day. But what I noticed is when she did something she was off to the races. I don't remember early words. But I do know she had 3 word sentences at 20 months and a vocabulary of close to 2000 words. I remember we were sort of keeping track because we were seeing if she was going to have a vocabularly of 200 words by her 2nd birthday, as suggested.

When she read her first word on her own (Dollar in the rental car store), she was 2.5 and sounded out one syllable then the next and put it together. Then she did it infrequently until she got close to 3, then it was spelling and sounding out one and two syllable words pretty regularly.

Her fact file is huge. That is what was most noticeable, her knowledge of different animals, places, words, and most importantly, princesses and their stories...

Ren

We have noticed the same thing with our daughter who just turned three. She is very selective about what she will do. If she is not interested she will start talking about something unrelated or she will leave. I worry how this would affect any formal testing we might have done in the future. I asked her to count to 20 for me yesterday and she got to about 12 and then trailed off and ran away to do something else. Then later that day she did 7 pages of addition in a new book she had picked out. Our local school wants us to have her screened, but I am worried that she might not cooperate.

Sweetie skyward,
Your DD may in fact not cooperate. But, Logically, that's not a reason to prevent having her screened at all. She may be quite uncooperative, and the screening might be a huge underestimate, and she might still qualify for the program.....

KWIM?
Grinity

Ok, I should have her screened it will be a good starting point and we will be able to find out more about the school. On A side point about toddlers, Proud mama. My one year old, almost 14 months went potty in the toilet yesterday, and we thought it was a fluke. Then today he took me in there and sat on the potty seat. So I took off his diaper and he went again, and then he clapped for himself. We gave him a sticker and made a big deal and he walked around the house showing everyone his little sticker. It was pretty cute.

Ok, I should have her screened it will be a good starting point and we will be able to find out more about the school. On A side point about toddlers, Proud mama. My one year old, almost 14 months went potty in the toilet yesterday, and we thought it was a fluke. Then today he took me in there and sat on the potty seat. So I took off his diaper and he went again, and then he clapped for himself. We gave him a sticker and made a big deal and he walked around the house showing everyone his little sticker. It was pretty cute.