Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Learning Environments Help! Am I making a big pre-school mistake?

I didn't mean to sound too vehement, but honestly if your child was bitten hard enough to bruise someone really should have seen it. That's why the adult/child ratio is so high, to prevent and/or catch these events and work with the children to stop the unacceptable behavior from re-occurring. Many care settings will ask a parent to pull their child if biting becomes a habit. Catching such behavior and modifying it is a common job in care settings.

One way or the other I personally think you made the right decision.

Mama, if you have a good feeling about the school, that is a good sign.

In my limited experience, schools actively seeking students because they don't have quite as many as they would like can tend put more energy into trying to serve their students. As long as they're not dead broke and going under or overwhelmed by recruiting, it's hopeful.

Just be sure to get a good read on the *teachers*. They're the ones in the classroom, so unless they're on board and excited to meet your child's needs, it won't happen. The director can tell you anything, but if the teachers don't toe the line, nothing else really matters.

I have heard that being the victim of a bully is a common reason why kids this age wish 'they were never born.' Seems to me that your son having this level of anger at the school is a sign of something bad. Not sure what, but what difference does it make? School, at this age, is supposed to be fun. Really!

He doesn't seem to have any trouble seperating from you, and althrough you and your DH aren't great role models of sociability, perhaps your mom and MIL are better at it?

In the end, there is plenty of good reason for some highly gifted people to be unsocial - they have never found a group of people that are enjoyable and safe to be around. You may actually be a very social person, but have made a decision quite early that most people are boring and dangerous, and so, gotten in the habit of being closed mouthed. Try hanging out here and seeing if you have an undiscovered side to yourself! Or you might just be happy with your own company and that's good too!

Smiles and Welcome,
Grinity

While that is logical, there's no way he bit himself. The bite was on the shoulder at an angle that he would've had to have removed his head to reach. Also, the girl admitted to the bite. The school "spoke to the parents and the child, making certain that she understands that it is not appropriate to bite."

Thanks for the welcome! I do enjoy people but have always been a bit shy and reserved (though this has lessened over the years). My husband, however, is a self-confirmed misanthrope. He has been making efforts to take our son to the park, etc., however, most social situations depend upon me. My mother is much like me, or rather, my husband and I are much like each of our mothers. My son is wonderfully social with those he is comfortable with. It takes him a while to warm up to people, but when he is comfortable, he will play and joke. He has a great sense of humor and loves jokes, puns, etc. I just wish I hadn't misplaced that Magic Mommy Wand and could wave it and make it all better!

If you find that wand, pass it around, would you?

Well, yesterday he tried out the new school . . . and loved it! I'm sooooo glad! My husband loved the school, too - he said everything about it is the complete polar opposite of the other school. It's calm, the director and teachers are warm and loving, and the other children immediately wanted to make my son feel welcome. Time will tell whether this remains the ideal environment or becomes too rigid as others have experienced with Montessori, but my slow-to-try-new-things son actually WANTED to go back! I asked him whether he liked the new school or the old one better, and he liked the new one. Then I asked what he liked the best, and he replied, "the playground." I asked him what he didn't like, and he said, "there's nothing I don't like." Yea!!!

Kriston, I will definitely share if I ever find it!

Yippee! That's music to my ears. What a relief!
Smiles,
Grinity

I knew it! I'm looking forward to seeing you grow into yourself over the next few years - yippee! The Swans have arrived!

Smiles,
Grinity

Oh, yay! I'm so glad for him, Mama.