Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Principal IS interested in helping gifted DS

WOW!!!! I talked to the principal yesterday and she said she is up for a challenge and wants to help my DS. She said she has some experience with gifted and most teachers do not. She wants to get the teacher on board with a plan. Now I need a plan. If you've read my many posts you might realize I need some how to get to have a manageable amount of stuff to talk about. I'm a little all over the place as I feel a bit over whelmed.

My DS is all "A" s except handwriting. We have him doing 3 & 4 th Grade Math. I'm not sure they will condense 3rd Grade Math any more or if it's worth it because his work he only spends 5mins. on this and he is not too bothered by it. I asked DS if he would like to do 2 digits timed facts instead and he said, "no". I'm not sure why but he was done talking about it at this point.

DS knows all his spelling the first day and has 5 days of worksheets to do related. His grade in this class is 100%. They are learning some terms and practicing handwriting. How would I figure out what he could skip? Would a teacher know?
This work book is among a folder of work he does self paced thru the day so if he skipped some and did something else he would still feel apart of his class. He works well independently. He could skip something else but I'm not sure what to ask for because everything is a possibility.

There are several subjects within this folder that if he could condense the work he could do something else. So any subject(s)is up for condensing. He has many interests and works well independently so that should not be a problem. I'm looking to balance his day not perfect it at this point.

I don't want him to feel like he can just skip something because he is not interested. In school there will be somethings he just has to do whether he likes it or not. The big question is how do we determine what would get skipped? How do I make the school feel comfortable he is learning what he needs. DS has amazing reading speed, and comprehension. He learns very quickly. Also how do I know the difference between not being interested and not being challenged enough?

We have applied to DYS so if we get in there that will help. I don't want to lose time waiting. My DS is not very happy at school and I'd like to start making a plan.

I am not interested in moving him up a grade right now. He does best with changes a little at a time. It would be fine for him to go up to another class but scheduling may be any issue as they have said this in the past. I have lots of ideas about what he could do. I just don't know how to make them feel comfortable to do something else. Letting him out of something needs to not be high maintenance for the teacher. Consistenty works best.

Does he actually feel a 'part' of his class, or does he feel 'apart' from his class. Is this a typo or a Freudian Slip?


Does your DS have any ideas? How does he feel about his current classroom? What can he imagine that would make it better?

OTGMom - I'm so excited that your Prin is on board with trying something. I think it's going to be a process, and you'll have to be flexible and try lots of somethings until you hit it just right.

One idea is to go for a gradeskip, but do it slowly. 3rd grade before lunch and 4th grade after lunch, or vice versa. It's going to be messy, and that is ok.

Best Wishes,
Grinity

What wonderful news! I second that a good starting point is to look at subject acceleration into a higher grade for part of the day. This would meet the need for changes a little at a time without being too high maintenance for the teacher. If that seems like too much of a change, I recommend you get a copy of Teaching Gifted Kids in the Regular Classroom. You may even want to get an extra copy for the principal if she doesn't already have one.
http://www.amazon.com/Teaching-Gifted-Kids-Regular-Classroom/dp/1575420899

This is a very real concern. This is one reason why gradeskips are so appealing. In a weird way, they allow a child to just 'blend in and be regular.' at least as much as possible. (Although full grade skips aren't for everyone.)

Things like spelling, you can have him take all whole year's words right now, and have him place out of spelling all together, same with Math. Reading, Science and History is more difficult - as they are so much about process. If they are taught independently, you could let him go through at a comfortable speed, and work on projects you design towards the end of the year. Or you could find some curriculum that reflects his interests and ability and put that into his folder, and give up on getting rid of the time wasters. Depends on the kid.

When was he 9?
I think I'd really push for a full grade skip ASAP. Our schools cut off is sometime in September, so a kid who is 9 would generally be in 4th grade already. After he adjusted to that, I'd look at subject acceleration in his favorite subjects.

It also allows the parents more opportunities to 'blend in and be regular' instead of trying to constantly balance on the fine line between advocating for their children's needs and being perceived as pushy.

LOL!!actually rolling on the floor laughing out loud with leaking tears. Oh Yes!

Here's my personal experience with 'in-class differentiation.' Seems I have a lot of baggage on board here. Hold on to your seats:

During DS13's 4th grade class, the school made a really good faith attempt at coming up with interesting assignments for him to do 'in parallel' with the class. DH and I had work tirelessly to advocate and explain DS to the school, and were thrilled that it was finally paying off. DS had friendships and was having a great time in school. DS was also reading under his desk about 4 hours a day. DS was a good deal happier, and I was tempted to 'leave things at that' but I took him to a local pyschologist who mentioned that DS kept talking about 'masking' himself.

So I switched him to a private school for 5th grade, still hoping that a gradeskip wouldn't be needed. Just before school started, the principle (who had always been very supportive appearing) sent me a copy of the note she had written to DS's new teacher in the public school 5th grade. (I had just signed the check for the private school.)

I was horrified to read the note. It described DS as deeply antisocial, a behavior problem, and 'we understand, it's because he's so bright.' I was taken aback, shocked really. Before you all think that there must be a grain of truth here somewhere, there are a few folks here who have met him, and he is really a wonderful kid. I was so grateful that my son wasn't going to have to spend a year with a teacher who had been primed to see him as a 'poor, unfortunate misery.'

What's my point? My point is that we really really do have to get our kids into a school environment that actually gives them what they need, instead of trying to modify, modify, modify to the point of 'nothing left to keep.' I've always heard the informal guideline is that if a child is working within 3 gradelevels of their assigned grade, then inclass modifications can work, but if it's more than that, they will need a combination of changing the classroom AND in class modifications.

Love and More Love,
Grinity

Yes, with DD7 it's been in-class differentiation every year and I've been walking the tightrope. I notice a big difference with DD5 being subject accelerated to a higher grade for reading and math. My feet feel much more firmly planted!

Seriously, I've also noticed a big difference in my relationship with the teachers with acceleration vs. non-acceleration. You can't appreciate a good teacher as much when there's a big disparity between the curriculum and what your child needs for curriculum.

One of the main ways they can "figure out" if a child is a candidate for a full grade skip is to administer the Iowa Acceleration Scale.

THAT IS WONDERFUL NEWS that they are working with you! WOOHOO! One small step for mankind! LOL!

Good for you!

THANKS FOR ALL THE SUPPORT.

I can hardly believe it but the principal is already doing things for us. Today, his teacher let him do a timed test with multiplication, instead of addition. She also let him skip his spelling page. We have a meeting planned for next week. I'm just worried I've got so much in my head and in my notes that I may try to do too much.

I really hear you all but I'm just not ready for a full or even half day grade increase. Maybe at some point he should have this but I need to know more before that move happens. I would just like to try one class if possible and see how that goes. My son does much better with a little change at a time.

He has also just began enrichment. The students can do independent studies this year. He is excited about this. If he can get free of some of the repetitions not needed he could have more time for independent study learning. This might not be exactly what he needs but it's a start. This might be enough to give him a better attitude about school and let him hang in there until I get more information.

Last year, I watched two of his class mates excited with him about an Independents Study. This was a wonderful thing- it drew kids to him socially and academically they were excited about learning. The day he did the presentation on his independent study I felt like I picked up a different Happy kid from school.

My DS and I talked again tonight. He said the reading feels babyish. I thinking this might be a good place for him to go up a grade or two. He has read several books above level. It might be amazing for him to sit in on an discussion of a story more on his level.

I really don't know exactly what he needs. I do know he need more challenge. He is a ambitious kid who wants to learn and not just make easy A s. I want to wait until I see if we get into DYS before I do anything big so they can guide us with all their experience. I want to see what testing is needed, if any, before we put him up a grade in something and he should really go up three. Too quick of a decision would mean more changes than necessary. I also want to look at the big picture. If we send him to high school over prepared in Math, will he be able to do college Math classes? I think I read our state pays for that but I don't know any more on this. I would love for my DS and I to blend in more but for now I think we just need some tweeks to keep him going until I get the big picture.

There is also a school a little out of our area that I've heard is about 2 years ahead and doesn't teach to the test. They can take SAT testing during junior high. Money is an issue but maybe somehow they will have more finacial aid next year or I'll win the lottery. But before I make this move I would like him to make some stronger local freindships and I would like to figure out if this is really a better fit for our family.

Best Wishes OTGMom-
I think subject acceleration in reading sounds wonderful. Let's hope that they go with it.
It's great that your school uses Independent Study- good luck!
Grinity

Except when trying to explain to someone who is not quite bright how your kid is in the same baseball league, is younger than that someone's son, yet is in first grade, not kindergarten... this happened to me last night. I've now realized that it's just best to keep activities based on age, like baseball, about DS's age, and school activities about grade... though I will be sure to write "6th Birthday Party" on his invitations being sent to school next week!

oh, and OTGM, GOOD LUCK! It WILL work out!

thanks for the help. onward march!!!!

I agree. I'm famous for building things up in my mind to be more fabulous that tney turn out to be. Yes apply, but the SAT scores speak volumes. Just mentioning that your child is taking the SATs opened doors and minds for me!

Smiles,
Grinity

Interesting! I was wondering about that when I saw Rick M's thread about his son's NWEA scores.
http://giftedissues.davidsongifted....uld_someone_help_me_inter.html#Post58935

What would be an 11th grade NWEA percentile target to look at taking the SAT, keeping in mind we've discussed the difference between the testing groups (all 11th graders vs. college bound)?

No, I'm just thinking about young kids who get high RIT scores which put them above the 50% of 11th graders taking the MAP test. Is that a good criteria for thinking about taking the SAT next? Or should it be a higher or lower percentile?

Thank you again, I am very thankful to have found this site and appreciate everyone's help.

I do realized DYS is not the magic pill. It will take some trial and error to make things better for my DS. The principal was very excited about the DYS possibility. The big things I'm looking for is having the guidance with what to work on now? I have so many ideas. I need help of how to approach the school. What's the next step? Should he have a certain test to see where his ability is? Ways to enrich his life like getting to know other kids like him.

Today, they made another little change and he doesn't have to do the copying of his spelling words 3 times. DS has been very overwhelmed with all the cursive writing. I keep telling him it will get easier and try to be patient. I think learning typing would also help him because this capability would open opportunities for more advancement where that skill would be helpful.

Attention Mathie People:

My DS in 3rd Grade wrote this answer on a school paper:

What would you like to learn about this year:
Square root decimals

Then I asked,
Do you know decimals?
I know some of them

Do you know square roots?
Last year when I was trying to figure it out and I didn't, Dad told me what they were and I understood. I want to learn Square Root decimals.

What would I do with this? He is doing 3rd and 4th grade math, skipping some stuff he doesn't need. Is square root decimals for later?

Would most of the Math web sites have square root decimals?

If he wants to learn this, would it be as simple as just offering the math sites and saying he could look to see if he could learn this here. I would help if he had questions. I do have a list of math websites that have been recommended here. I just was not sure which direction to point him or if I needed to say he should learn something else first.

I do like your thinking of teaching him to teach himself. Generally, I offer books and activites about things that he could learn and it's up to him if he wants to make the effort. Most of the time he goes for it. I tell him it's ok for him to decide what he is interested in learning at home. I do try to follow his leads too.