Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Age or Ability Specific Forums Middle School Nerds

My daughter agrees with those definitions, thats what shes always told me also. Shes in middle school, and I think her mind is messing with her. I think she thinks that other people think of her as a nerd, but I really don't think they do. I think this because she has also told me of times when people are impressed with her, but who knows. The point is, DD has completely buried herself from doing any academic activities. She could have joined MathCounts, and she even said that she really wanted too, but that shes already a "big enough geek." I think shes feeling a bit better this year, because she made the school basketball and track teams, so she feels a bit more "popular" but still, she says she does not want to "disturb the balance of geekhood and popularity." Wow. I was never in gifted programs or anything, but I don't think being smart is anything to be ashamed of and would have given anything to be smart when I was her age. These things just don't make since.

That's very sad Bassetlover that your DD feels she can't who she really is.

She has no role models of an athletic, GT womanhood to inspire her?

What do you call a nerd when she is 35? CEO!!

For girls in particular, middle school is all about who's who. Once they get to high school, they tend to splinter into groups and there isn't anywhere near the pressure of trying to fit in.

There actually comes a point when college is being discussed that your DD's position will become enviable, so tell her to hang in!

Ellipses: It was the same for me in junior high. Music was a place to redirect my energy and escape from the bullying. When I was ready to think about college prep, I had astonishing self-discipline and concentration skills from those years of music rehearsal, and it kept the math side of the brain working perfectly. I aced a physics degree, and I couldn't have done it without the musicianship skills taught by my band teacher.
You just need to get her through junior high with a minimum of damage.
If you can find a mentoring program for girls through a local college, go for it.
I'm female, and I can tell you that junior high is the age where the capable girls lose interest. There's only 10% women in electrical engineering, computer engineering and physics. It's a wonderful career for the ones who can survive the bullying in school.

She loves her band director, who will also teach choir and a small jazz ensemble next year (what they call an 8th period class - must be after school?) I also know that they have an amazing art teacher there also. This may sound strange, but I will ensure that she gets in all of these classes.

I don't really care if she takes Social Studies (Colorado History) or even English in an online course. The principal is going to flip since everyone here takes the same courses. It is just that she can manage these and can probably get more from them, but she really needs the music and art at this age - psychologically. And I really cannot teach art.

I doubt they will fuss too much. They need her scores. Last year, they panicked when I began teaching in a different district. They were afraid I would take her with me.

Basset - your DD would not feel as accepted by her geeky friends if she's in sports? I hope she continues to diversify her portfolio or be a hybrid or a cross-over artist or otherwise defy being labelled or pigeon-holed. It's a very important skill to develop at her age. She obviously has the goods to be a multi-dimensional, capable, confident, dynamic person. Good luck with her - you must be very proud of her!

That's a very good point.