Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Age or Ability Specific Forums I can't be the only one, can I?

I have heard countless times that as a gifted child gets older their "uniqueness" is less noticible. It's still there but other kids are also reading, writing, doing arithmetic, etc. so that when a gifted kid does the same it isn't as incongruent. There's no glaring discrepency, as there is when a two year old is writing words or spelling, etc.

So here I am, my eldest will be five in a few short months and the separation between her and her age peers is still obvious. Talking with some of the moms in my homeschool group, it's clear that her interests and abilities are inline with the older girls that are at minimum twice her age.

This doesn't strike me as "blending in" in any sense of the concept. I can't be the only one whose kid is like this! I'm not saying she has to hide who she is or anything like that, only that from what I had read on various gifted boards, I expected it to somehow be different now. I thought for sure, the things she did would be just another thing that kids do. Does that make sense?

My assumption is that this difference may be less noticeable closer to 8 or 9. It's still very obvious for my 6 year old.

Blatantly obvious for my 7yo. He's reading Dickens, taking Arabic and doing pre-algebra. He doesn't blend. :p

It might depend on levels of GTness here, since MG and closer to ND might manage to fit better, especially if they're GT in one subject and not across the board and get most of their intellectual stimulation at home instead of at school. They might slip past teachers unnoticed, sadly.

But I doubt HG+ kids are going to slow down.

I think how much challenge they get in school is a biggie, too. If GT kids are working at grade level between K and 3rd grade, yes, they might "level out" a bit because the GT kids really haven't learned much of anything for 4 years, while the ND kids have! That's hardly the kind of leveling out that I think is intended, however!

My best friend in high school was gifted in what I think of as gifted, in fact she should have given birth to my children not me. She didn't hide how smart she was, she also happened to be very pretty so guys didn't mind that she was twice as smart than they were. There was never a point when she blended, she always stood out - in a good way. So I think it depends on the child, is that child driven? more passive? I look at my 5 year old I can't imagine her ND peers catching up at any point. But she is a very driven child. I can see my 4 year old blending more just because she's more passive. Hope that helps:)

And she enjoyed hanging out with you because.....why?

Ruf is always reminding us that we like to hang out with people who 'get our jokes' and that this is about giftedness. I used to think that I was one of those 'pretty girls' who had a thing for 'brillient guys' - sort of a fetish. It took me a long long time to accept reality. How could I be gifted with so many flaws?

My DS is much more interested in 'masking' his uniqueness. In fact, when he gets around other Davidson YSP kids, I see a side of him that I never see at home, and I consider myself very accepting (I'm just not stimulating in that particular way.)

But no, I don't think that anyone would mistake him for ND. Or me either, no matter how hard I tried. LOL, a few years ago, as a project, I sat a few of my local friend down and told them about this side of myself that I've been hiding. Let's just say that I wasn't ever as good an actress as I though I was.

A new friend said to me recently: 'You are so brillient, how do you even relate to regular people?' I had to laugh.

Just for the record, as much progress as I've made with my gifted denial, I still keenly feel my bottleneck areas. I mean, don't try to have a conversation with me about the Obama cabinet. I'm a single topic girl: Gifted and The meaning of Life. Ok, that's two. But you get the picture.

Grins

For DS8, it gets less "noticeable" just because he knows he won't get an audience talking about algebra / cooking, so he just doesn't bring those subject up anymore. He mingles with his classmates by talking about bionicles and dairy of the wimpy kids, club penguins etc. If u are a parent of another child and u see him in school, u won't think he is any different.

OK, point well taken.

LOL! GT denial, alive and well again!

I have to agree with crisc that it takes until about 8-9 for the differences to become less noticeable. For my boys, now 18&20, this was the case. They were and still are
"gifted", but it was definitely less noticeable as the other kids started reading, etc. My daughter doesn't stick out (She wouldn't like to) because she's been double grade accelerated. She fits in so well socially and academically I don't think the other kids (outside of her class) even know she's only six.

Laura