Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Age or Ability Specific Forums nature versus nurture and milestones

Congratulations and best wishes for a bright future for your new one!

Congratulations, Seablue! What a joyous time for you all--truly much to be thankful for!

blessings
minnie

Oh thank you all for your congrats!

KatelynsMom, we also have a miracle baby. We've been married 17 years and have a toddler... a long time and a story so dramatic even Hollywood wouldn't believe it. I hope you do go on to adopt - so many wonderful childen out there, and you sound like a great mom.

I love miracle baby stories and by what you described of your pregnancy I am sure yours was an amazing wonderful story (the getting pregnant). I do feel for you what you went through with the pregnancy but I am sure looking at your beautiful child you would not change a thing and now you will have another beautiful child to add to your family. I am sure all of your family is so excited and counting down the days!

On a sidebar: I want to state this since it seems a few of the mothers on this board were in their late 30s, early 40s when they had their babies. (I was 35 when I was pregnant) While I was pregnant I had the tv on one of those morning talk shows (today or good morning I don't remember) and they were talking about myths with kids; doing a true, false game with the audience. I don't remember all the questions but one peeked my interest: Children born to 35+ mothers are on average smarter then children born to younger mothers? They said it was true and could not give a definite reason why. They argued older eggs as a possibility or maturity and waiting which meant most 35+ moms have higher educations. It struck me as funny but hey maybe they are on to something!

I was in my late 30's when I had my son. Every one of my son's gifted friends has an older mother and several of of them are teachers. They waited until they had an education and a good job before they started their families. We live in a small town where it seems like most women in their 30's are already grandmothers, so at least I am not alone as an older mom.

We just found out that my niece is pregnant. I am happy for her and she says the baby was planned even though she didn't finish college, has a job that doesn't pay very well, has a house with a high monthly payment compared to her income, and she and her husband just realized that they can't afford $200 a week for daycare. They are hoping that I will change my mind and babysit during the day, while I also homeschool my twice exceptional 10 year old, and try to spend time with my elderly parents who live next door, one of whom is in the last stage of dementia.

I wonder if it possible for a baby in daycare to get the ideal amount of nurturing. I wonder how much of a difference this really makes. I know that my older mom friends and I really tried to do our best to provide our babies with everything they needed and I think this is going to be really hard for my niece.

KatelynsMom, yes, miracle baby indeed! Without covering the details, let's just say I went through menopause at age 36 and still got pregnant at age 39 (with the help of a fleet of HG+ doctors LOL). And that isn't even the miracle part.

And yes, I didn't mind the high risk pain and agony, knowing I was actually lucky enough to be pregnant.

Oops, I forgot to mention in my earlier post that my personal opinion is that being gifted is a product of nature, even though I know how strongly nurture can and does impact our development.

In sports you have to be a genetic superstar who goes on to work hard and has a competitive personality and the opportunities to become a champion. Not all of us has an equal opportunity to become Tiger Woods.

It was a running joke around here when I recited the sidebar to my friends. Most of my friends are in their 30s and have a higher education so it is interesting to see how the kiddos are developing. Most are gifted in level 1 or 2. One friend is the same age as me and her kids are clearly HG. My other friend (has her masters and was a gifted child herself) was 30 when pregnant with her first and her DD is probably level 1. She knows her colors, shapes, rote counts to 10 and is starting to learn her ABCs (she is 2). She also has some problems with verbal and was tested recently b/c she was not speaking in 2 word sentences and the words she did say were very muddled. I could only understand about 5 of her words. She was also slow in her gross and fine motor skills. So maybe she would have been more gifted if her mother was over 35. LOL I just don't know if I believe the 35+ stat, but I do believe that parents with higher education and are more set in their careers tend to have smarter kids.

As for your niece I understand what you are talking about. My husbands sister's daughter had a child very young and we just found out that the marriage is not working out so now she will be a single mother. I can not image that this environment benefits a child. But don't let your niece guilt you into anything b/c it sounds like you have your hands full!