Thank you everyone for the great replies. They have helped. I finally spoke with DH as well (i've been a hunting widow). We'll talk to the preschool teacher, and if it doesn't really seem fixable, we won't enroll him in preschool after christmas. We do have some zoo and science museum classes we could do (not really nearby, but doable), or some on-our-own field trips that we could use our preschool money for and DS would be happier, i'm sure. DS still has gymnastics with friends, his best friend is joining his swimming lesson, and we'll try to add more friend stuff too. Maybe now's a good time for piano lessons to start too.
Grinity - i hadn't thought about the fact that the other kids are probably getting praise for their cooperation and DS is not so much.

acs - your son's preschool sounds great. I don't think there are very many "choose your own adventure" type preschools around here, but I'll look into it. Although i'm leaning toward being done with preschool if this doesn't work out. This is kind of sad for me because we loved this teacher last year - she really seemed to "get" our DS and she was the first outsider to tell us he'd need to be accelerated someday.
kriston - i like your mom's saying; i'll remember that one!
DS does like the kids in his class for regular play. And I'm still not 100% sure that DS is just saying he hates preschool because he'd simply rather be with me. Maybe that just means we need to seek out some intellectual peers for his preferred kind of play.
DH and I commiserated with each other, thinking that we wouldn't have to deal with this just yet.
acs- i'm still laughing about the bloody bunny!
Thanks to all for sharing your experiences. Momx2 - i'm glad things finally turned around, but thank you for the red flag warning, and i'm sorry your son has bad memories.
