Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Identification, Testing & Assessment Gifted? Does anyone feel doubts?

For me, it's a surreal life. Your child is "normal" to you, but not a typical child so of course you'll have doubts. I haven't doubted as much since we got his full report, a lot of my emotional struggles have settled down. Grateful for that, it's been an intense four years. I do still think, "what if the next test results are much lower? Then we were wrong!" But my DS 4 has been obsessively, excitedly doing multiplication verbally all day. I did think, "I bet a lot of four year olds do this." See? That's not a rational thought, but a reconciliation of a surreal experience. It's just surreal and you think there is no way your child can be that different.

Well said.

I had a different but related experience years ago--when I kept thinking a relative's child must have a learning problem or low IQ, bc my only early/young child experience was with my first born son, who did pretty typical HG stuff, though nothing prodigious.

Turned out, the child is likely high average-moderately gifted. Guess which child has enjoyed school, done very well academically, is athletic, musically talented, popular with peers and teachers, and generally well-adjusted? (rhetorical)

I feel this way but also feel that I don't even know what "typical" is since both of my kids seem to have similar ability levels. There are a few areas where the other "e's" (2e) really come out with both of them.

DS comes across as delayed in some areas and very advanced in other areas and this difference is VERY obvious. He could probably be the poster child for 2e.

DD does not come across as obviously gifted, she comes across as average because the giftedness masks the disability and vice versa (the giftedness was more obvious when she was younger) but there are those moments where she can run circles around even me, like solving spatial puzzles or navigating a computer. Of she will say something that sounds very articulate or insightful for her age. I was not expecting her PRI score on the WISC to be 147 and often wonder if there could have been an error.

The day before yesterday, I gave DD4 a sand painting kit and she was pouring sand onto the paper and did not realize that she needed to peel off the paper. Maybe there was another applicant with the same birthday as hers at both of the schools where she was tested and their scores got mixed up.

You earned a literal LOL with that one. Yesterday I told DS12 to get dressed so we could run errands-- he emerged in sweat pants and long sleeved shirt. It was 90 degrees outside. I hadn't even considered the "switched at birth" angle. :P

How does that country song go?

"Once a day, everyday, all day long"

Until she then does something completely, make you fall off your chair unexpected!

All joking aside, I have noticed that my DD will often regress just before another developmental leap right past a milestone - happens less now she is 10 obviously.

She often does absent mindedly dumb stuff but she gets that from me so I cannot complain :-)

Yes! In my case I think it's because DS _does_ act younger with me than with other people. My MIL often sends me emails of clever things he said when he's with her, and I always think - why doesn't he say that when I'm around??? LOL

With me I think he feels free to 'let go' and so what I get to see is all the sensory-seeking behaviour that appears very juvenile.

Also, when we did the vision testing recently I was made aware of just how much he must be compensating intellectually on a minute-by-minute basis for his visual and DCD issues. I think it uses up a lot of his mental capacity and so the good stuff is hidden.

Don't usually have doubts when it comes to his ability to navigate academic material. The asynchrony causes doubts or frustrations, though, when it comes to things like having to tell him 20 times (in a row) to position his face over his plate, so crumbs get on it rather than the floor. Or in things like still not tying shoes.

There are many children on this board who are extremely driven and achieving extraordinary things. I've met - virtually and in real life - many gifted children with voracious appetites for academics at home, for competitive athletics, for musical achievements. Anyone who meets them can easily see what an extraordinary child they are. I don't have one of those.

DS11 gets mediocre grades, isn't interested in sports, and finds piano practice a chore. He'd love to do high school math in elementary (but alas, acceleration is taboo around here). Once out of school, however, he resents spending time on "homework no one else has to do". He easily took on AoPS Algebra - after getting Bs and Cs in grade 4 math. He has slow processing speed, and significant executive function challenges. Few teachers view him as gifted. He's very far from the stereotypical view of gifted as a high-performing, independent, self-motivated achiever.

But living with him, since the day he was born (literally!) - no moment of it made any sense until I discovered Hoagies (8 years later - I'm a little slow). And if you talk to him, really talk, holy cow. The things happening inside that head blow me away. I find it gets more and more shocking every day, as he's starting to get enough math and science knowledge - his passions - to put together ideas that make my head spin. So yes, this board used to make me feel like a pretender, but I think I'm getting over that .