Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Moving for a school - is that crazy?

My daughter is only 11, but I am already obsessing about high school and what her options will be. We have zero schools in our immediate area that will be a good fit for her. Has any one either contemplated moving or moved temporarily to have their child attend a school? We love our house and where we live, so it would definitely be temporary with visits home for long weekends or breaks. My husband and I both do consulting work, so we can be anywhere as long as we have technology by our side. If you've done this how did it work for your family?

We moved (permanently) 2 summers ago to a bigger city 60 miles away for a better school. I work at the same place so my commute each way is about 75 minutes. My DW is SAHM.

So far, we believe we made the right choice. We may move back to the old neighborhood when the kids head to college.

Having read far too many horror stories here and elsewhere about schools that looked good but turned out to be horrible, I think that I would rent first :-)

Oh, absolutely rent, as we would not plan on making it long term, and we would still return "home" as often as possible. I never thought educating my child would be such a difficult process.

Not at all. I am willing to consider moving in the next couple of years in time for high school although that would not be the only reason. However, I am currently spending a lot of time transporting DS/DD to/from middle school.

Well, if I had a pg kid and could move absolutely anywhere, I'd give Reno, Nevada, very serious consideration...as it is, one of the reasons we shall be moving from the rural suburbs into the city is better access to educational options for the kids, but it's by no means the only reason. I think it is just very rare that one could move for a school without having to put professional or financial considerations first, but if you could, why not? Happy kids, happy family.

There are at least a few students who have moved to our town to attend the school my kids go to. Not crazy. Clearly, do your homework to ensure it truly is a good fit - and if it is an option - go for it.

We are considering it -- it would have to be tied to a job transfer or job change. The trick is knowing that you're moving somewhere your child would be admitted to said school and thrive. When I think too hard about that, it makes homeschooling look very attractive, but we have a child who loves school for the friends part above all. Some of this may depend on how his younger brother develops -- he'll start school in the fall and although he's not at the level his brother was at this age, he is clearly very bright (and hasn't been in an environment during the day like his brother was, Montessori without any limits on what he could learn).

If we did not have a good neighboring school district and a friendly open enrollment system, we'd probably have moved. Not crazy at all, in my opinion.

Best of luck,
--S.F.

ITA not crazy at all if there is a good chance the new school will be substantially better.

My child is 7 and he has been in 3 schools already. We naively assumed that each of those options would be the best fit for him. We are not done changing schools! We are living in a house in a coveted PS zone and paying property taxes for other people's kids to get the excellent PS education that this school is reputed for That is how things worked out for us.

We plan to move again before my son reaches middle school - but, we will commute to the new school for a while before moving to the new neighborhood.

If you are looking at private schools, which mean that residency requirements are not applicable, my advise is to try the school for 6 months (commute to it if you can) and then decide to move or buy. If it is a public school, renting first could be a good option. Since you said that high school is your concern, then, while planning your move, you might want to also consider other factors like availability of options for extracurricular activities, enrichment, possible tutoring centers etc.

Good luck.

We bought a repo rental house in a neighboring large city (about an hour away). We made sure it would be suitable for us to live in should the circumstances warrant. So it's an investment property, but suitable for us, at least during the week.

We also have adult children who have rented it from us at below market rent, so it has worked out, although we have tenants at the moment.

We actually intended to move to the city, but ended up staying put for now. We are happily homeschooling.

In my experience, buying a house based on criteria other than schools is unheard of. Everyone here lives where they do because of the schools. Many were sold a bill of goods, but only because of bait and switch.

Well i bought my house based on what I could afford but I know many people take schools into account.

I don't think that it's a crazy idea at all - I'd consider that many *many* people make the decision re where to buy their house based on the reputation of the school district they will be living in (gifted children or not).

That said, there are other reasons I'd consider *not* moving when you are already established in a home - if none of these are considerations, then yeah, a move is ok. If any of these are issues, I'd not be so quick to move. It's really *tough* knowing there are potentially better schools out there "if only" you could move, but the flip side of that is - school is just one part of life, and sometimes not everything is able to work out and other things might take a higher priority. So here's what I would consider as reasons not to move (and conversely, depending on the answer - reasons *to* move):

Financial (if you are a home owner) - how long have you been in your current house? How much of a loan is left to pay off? If you're heavily into having paid off your loan, are you going to take a hit in terms of potentially losing value over the $ you've put into the house? Or will you be ok or make a profit? What is the difference in expenses (house and cost of living) between where you are now and where you will be living?

Neighborhood - do you like your current neighborhood? Do you think you'll enjoy your next neighborhood just as much? Are there major differences? Traffic? Yard space etc? How long have you known your neighbors? What types of relationships do you have in your current neighborhood? Are there families you can depend on in an emergency? Are there other children for your child to play with etc.

How 'real' is the reality of the better school(s) in the other school district? Are you basing your impressions on what you've read, what the school district says, or what other parents in the trenches have told you? How reliable are those other parents' experiences relative to your own? Do you know the people who've given you advice well enough to trust that what they are saying is really what's up? Or to know how to filter what they are saying to give you an accurate picture Will you have regrets if you move and find that the new school isn't all you'd hoped for it to be? Will you still be happy with the move?

How much will it cost to sell again and move back to where you are?

Just a few cents worth of what I'd consider!

Good luck with whatever you decide,

polarbear

To add to what polarbear brought to the table: If your move is significantly far away, you might want to look at city-data.com You can discover quite a lot from their info.

For instance, years ago I worked with a woman whose husband was recruited from Huntsville, Alabama into the Silicon Valley to work for Silicon Graphics. She said the salary offered seemed to be huge, but they discovered after the move that houses and cost-of-living were eating up most of it. So much so that they weren't able to afford a home and had to rent instead of buy. They didn't do their research properly before taking the leap.

We have considered moving from our rural town to a major metro area one state over. When DH consulted his boss, (the district manager) about a pay raise to off-set the significantly higher cost-of-living, he was told that the pay scale for his position didn't account for location. In other words, he'd be making the same amount, but we'd be paying so much more for everything. Our standard-of-living here vs. there is overall higher, that for now it takes priority over the lure of "perfect school". That may change as DS gets older, however. Right now, DH and DS resist moving from this home.

We moved to a neighboring school district because the gifted program was better. It was only a 9 mile move, and I know some of our friends thought we were crazy, but it has worked out very well for us, turns out we LOVE our new neighborhood which just so happens to be full of other families who moved to this area because of the gifted program, so it turns out there are a lot of peers for our kids as well. It's been a win-win.

We are considering doing the same thing. I think if you have exhausted all of your possibilities in schools near you, it makes sense to think about a move. You are not alone!

It is kind of nice to see I am not alone!!! I had NO idea educating my child was going to be so difficult and I don't really think I am a difficult person!! I have a high set of standards, but I'd like to think I was reasonable, sometimes it just seems so frustrating!

To add my voice to the few that urge caution about this kind of strategy...




Yup, us, too.


It's worth noting that children who are MG or HG may well be helped by a move to a more favorable location, education-wise. With 2e or higher LOG children, however, I'm not so convinced that it can be done through calculated planning.

We (briefly) considered moving to Reno or the Seattle area (for the early-entry program via UW), I know that, but those were the only places that really seemed to have what we needed in order to actually do much good beyond what we were already able to provide in place. Besides-- hey, the quality of life here is good and the cost of living relatively reasonable. So we stayed put. I don't really regret that, by the way.

It has been hard on my dental work to hear all of our friends, acquaintances, and neighbors GUSH about the public schools here, however, while we pay our taxes and put a sock in it.

I would agree that it's not crazy, but it certainly hasn't been a factor at all in our decision-making. We had no clear expectation of children who were NT, MG, HG, 1e, 2e, or anything else when we chose a place of residence (though >= MG did seem reasonably likely, and I had a suspicion that another e might be in play, based on family history). We did, however, know what the range of services was in the general area--and that it would range from good to horrific for disabilities, and better-than-average to horrific for GT (stronger services for both exceptionalities being in the same school district). We also knew that the better property values were not going to line up with the better services, due to the inability of the general public to do accurate data analysis.

Which is why we began community selection with other criteria, always reserving private and homeschooling as options.

We happened to end up in a community with a strong educational reputation, so we also get to smile vaguely when others laud our public schools.

Based on my experience in the Boston suburbs, when you move to an area with a reputation for great public schools, you may be disappointed, but the many disappointed parents seeking more create a large market for afterschool programs, some of which, such as contest math programs, are suitable for gifted children. I have asked a few of the afterschool organizers about how to advocate for acceleration in the public schools, and they typically say that public school math classes should be regarded as social experiences. This outlook is consistent with the Serenity Prayer and not coincidentally preserves the market for afterschools.

Sounds like someone who lives in my city, where the city is known for it's good schools yet the mayor owns one of those afterschool tutoring centers.

...and is excellent for the most skilled public school teachers, who can then supplement their teacher pay with tutoring/afterschooling income. Not unlike the Taiwanese system, where the entire system tacitly is designed around nonproductive warehousing during the school day (class sizes of 70+ not uncommon), followed by intensive, income-differentiated afterschooling, with instruction by largely the same teachers you had during the day.