Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Learning Environments Gifted students in poor educational environments

In the WSJ article I cited, the children being tutored travel from their neigborhoods, which may well have high crime rates, to the church, located in an area which I assume is safer.

Well that makes more sense than a swarm of amateur volunteers travelling in the opposite direction to do one on one mentoring.

To give another perspective, I live in a small city where there is a LOT of poverty but virtually no murder...maybe one per year, and that's usually a man killing his wife or perhaps another personal grudge. I have zero worries about being murdered at random anywhere around here (and we go to "bad" parts of the city all the time...some would say we live in one).

Actually, I don't think random murders for being in the wrong place at the wrong time are common anywhere in the US. You could get mugged, though, for sure. I understand not wanting to go to some areas, but I guess my point is, there's plenty of poor children living in, uh, non-murdery places.

That's where you live. Where I live is definitely very dangerous. There are plenty of poor children but very few of them live in non-murdery places. Random murders do happen. Innocent people do get killed by stray bullets. There are a lot of murders. A lot. I'm describing where I live. I'm not saying other people are in this same type of environment. Obviously some places are much safer, and elsewhere in the world some places are much more dangerous.

This conversation is kind of ridiculous. Is there really any doubt that there are dangerous areas in the USA? Being afraid to go into a bad part of town is a very rational and prudent fear.

Having the whole "gifted community" (whatever that is) inviting themselves into these dangerous areas to provide one on one "mentoring" (whatever that is) is ludicrous. Besides, as I said in my first post "Our school district definitely tries to identify gifted students from underprivileged backgrounds and provides full time self contained gifted education." Unfortunately this only happens in dangerous schools, so we don't participate.

I don't even know that there is a "Gifted Community" per se. I am primarily a parent and only secondarily a parent of "Gifted" children. Most of what I do is simply parenting rather than gifted-centric. I am very sensitive to infinite differences in parenting philosophies, approaches, priorities, etc and would never presume to mentor anyone in that regard. At the risk of sounding politically incorrect, I will have to say a definite no to "mentoring" parents who "are willing to be highly engaged" but do not have "money and means." Obviously, my children live in a safe home and do not go hungry, etc. However, my engagement with my children is essentially an investment of my time and my energy rather than money and means. In my neck of the woods, substantial public and private funding support education resources for all low SES children. There are also tremendous resources aimed at educating interested (particularly low SES) parents to help support their children's education/achievements. I appreciate your earnest desire to "provide a solid support system" for this subset of parents. However, I can just imagine the potential horror on a hypothetical parent's face when I, for example, instruct her to spend 3+ hours daily driving her child to/from a "better" school. On the other hand, I would have no problems mentoring a low SES kid, especially in the type of setting that Bostonian referenced.

Hey, instead of mentor you could be their chauffeur!

I don't feel comfortable either with the idea of go out to "mentor" other parents - not just in the area of giftedness. I don't feel comfortable for instance discussing breastfeeding with a new mom unless they ask me specifically about it. So I don't know I would feel comfortable discussing what I would recommend to another parent who have a different background and values from me.

The daycare we use is a mix of SES families, and families from very diverse backgrounds. There is one other boy DS's age that DH and I suspect is gifted, and it was a struggle as to whether we should say anything to her because we had no idea if we would be on the same page... And I did broach the topic, and she knows we are tapping into various gifted resources for our children. And for her, finances and time are so tight that we feel bad about the fact that she won't be able to follow our paths as easily... And we are at a loss as to how to bridge that gap. She is aware of the local resources and frustrations (we are not in the same school district but the little I gleaned, she is aware of the GT options for her district). So I have left it knowing that she has my contact information, and trying to support her when we see her (but since we are both working mothers and on totally different schedules, it is not that often).

But I am not comfortable with anything more because many parents get very touchy over all areas of parenting (and I seen this a lot with nursing vs formula worlds, working vs stay at home mothers - I had a hard time with some of the more militant parents/mothers who are hostile to the idea that there could be other viewpoints - and this is just another area that I don't feel like I want to wade into a hostile us vs them or "my way is better" tone).

Once I stop having to guess at everything I do while parenting a gifted kid and feel confident enough, I would gladly mentor given that the folks I mentor are completely philosophically in synch with me and have a kid with the same nuances as mine. Until then I'll be glad my taxes support a local district that gets it, and we'll continue volunteering at my son's school which is a heavily mixed partial magnet in a fairly safe area.

What I see a lot of in my area is programs advertised for 'gifted' or kids interested in STEM that are particularly directed at students in the lower scoring school districts in the area. These are often held at local universities. The problem these programs have are unless they bus in the students many parents can't afford the time to drive them. If you work two jobs just to pay for rent & food, there is no time to drive your kid to challenging activities. Or even time to notice the activities exist. What is needed is teachers that help identify these kids, unfortunately teachers have huge classes and are usually busy taking care of more pressing needs.

I have thought about working for one of these programs. I'm interested in helping at one of the local programs to encourage girls in computer science or math program. I'd have no problem going into the poorer area's close to me (I have friends who teach at these schools), although I might think really long before going into south central LA.

Honestly, I am quite shocked at the unwillingness of parents to help other parents. Particularly regarding the assumed stereotypes. We are all at this forum because we believe that gifted children are unique. I asked this (somewhat hypothetical) question for 2 reasons. The first is that it really surprises me this type of mentoring is already not an option. The second reason is that I hope a seed can be planted should you meet other parents who may be in this situation or should you be involved in a group or advocacy which could embrace this idea.

My 13yr daughter is very bright, though not gifted. She also has hearing loss. Our school district has a completely voluntary program for hearing loss families. This program is entirely ran by parents. The only role of the school is they have a list of parents who have volunteered to mentor other parents. The school simply notifies new parents that the mentoring program exists & should they wish to receive this assistance, the school can provide contact info. This is the program I am familiar with but I have heard of other similar programs. It is very informal but it was invaluable when I had questions or needed advice. It gives us the ability to ask a parent of a child a few years older than her what we should expect. It provides us with parents who understand our concerns. It provides our children with an opportunity to relate to children who have "been there, done that".

You were correct that I left the framework open ended. I see the possibilities here as endless. If you honestly fear for your life meeting someone perhaps you could use email, Skype, or FaceTime. It is disappointing to see people who would view this as a waste of their time. In my experience the mentor program has been just as rewarding to the mentor family.

The sad truth is that many children go without an appropriate educational environment because their parents simply do not know there is another way. Some parents are middle-class & live in good neighborhoods. That does not automatically enable them to know how to get their child what they need. Parents in poverty are very unlikely to have know where to look or even that their child needs more. I do understand hat some parents would not want this & I am in no means saying this should be mandatory for anyone. I simply think there must be a way that somehow there must be a way to be better.