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Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,691 Likes: 1
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The difficulty in responding to GT kids is that you are never quite certain of the mental age of the child at any given moment since it can fluctuate by about a decade in the span of two minutes. I think is so true. Sometimes I think I am talking to a teenager, and sometimes to a a three year old. But I found that rules that apply to all of us, like if anyone forgets to say please, you say "freeze" and you have to count to 10 and then ask again. And if Daddy is using a mean tone then he has to do a "timeout". He doesn't really but the fact that we all have to follow the rules seems to work for her. Ren
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Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 6,145
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I agree, Ren. I mean, "Do as I say but not as I do" doesn't work for any kid, GT or no. I think requiring that everyone speak to others--regardless of age--with respect and compassion is important.
I do make the distinction that in matters of safety, I may be required to give orders. I don't say "Please don't walk out in front of that car." I say, "STOP! Don't you move!"
Also, if I have said "Please wash your hands for dinner" and no one moves, I get less and less polite with each successive request. If they're rude enough to ignore me, then I get more and more directive and less concerned about niceties in response. I'm okay with that, as well.
Kriston
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Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 830
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One speaker at a gifted conference advised the audience that we should treat our children as we would our dear adult friend. She used the example of the friend coming over to tea and she accidentally spilled the tea Twice! To the kid we might flare in anger and say they need to be more careful--go get a towel to clean it up! To the dear adult friend we would probably say something like "You're a little off today, honey" while we mopped it up. I don't know it that's completely relevant to this thread, but I loved that part of her speech. I don't think I agree with this. I don't think there's much point in flying off the handle, but I would definitely ask my kids to clean up after themselves. I would not ask that of a guest.You just pointed out the difference between how I treat GS8 who lives with us and GD's 5 & 7 who just visit! Although I have been making an effort to make the GD's clean up after themselves more so GS8 can see they're all treated equally. I also agree with Cathy A's statement: Yes, gifted kids can be adult-like in some ways. But they are not mini-adults. I do agree that family members should treat each other with respect. However, I don't think we should treat our young children as adult friends.
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Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 830
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....
I do make the distinction that in matters of safety, I may be required to give orders. I don't say "Please don't walk out in front of that car." I say, "STOP! Don't you move!"
Also, if I have said "Please wash your hands for dinner" and no one moves, I get less and less polite with each successive request. If they're rude enough to ignore me, then I get more and more directive and less concerned about niceties in response. I'm okay with that, as well. I knew I liked you!
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Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 6,145
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Back atcha! 
Kriston
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