Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy How do you talk to your DC about their Gtness?

Thanks, MoN and Incog. Here's an example of what goes on:

We were at the orthodontist yesterday and DD9 had Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix with her. DD was talking to the assistant and asked her what kind of books she enjoyed. The assistant said she liked mysteries and DD replied that she could probably tell that DD is a Harry Potter fan. The assistant was impressed. DS was not to be outdone <eyeroll> so he chimes in with "I'm 5 and I can read Secrets of Droon!"

I flashed back to his optometrist appointment two weeks ago where the physician's assistant went gaga over him and asked him about all the stuff he could do. He had gotten lots of positive attention there.

I think he receives mixed messages--some adults are curious about him and want to find out about his abilities and others are not interested. I can see that DD has learned to be more subtle; to find out what kind of person she is talking to. He doesn't do that yet. Also, there's the competitive component. He always wants to compete with DD. <sigh> My mom assures me that's normal...

I'm sure age is a big part of it, but DD has always been very perceptive about social cues. You're right, she managed to talk about her Harry Potter book by making it a conversation about interests. I hope some of her techniques rub off on DS

I'm probably not the best one to help him...I was a social dunce as a kid and, while I do ok now, I'm still a bit on the awkward side.

Well the mixed messages are a problem. I see your point, especially because he's getting such a desirable reaction from some adults. He'll probably realize he doesn't get the same reaction from kids as he gets older.

We have tried a couple of things with DS5, one was that only give help to other students when asked. Let others participate, and we used the comparason of children that can run faster then he can, and how would he want to be treated. Also there is to be no bragging at school, however at home with mom and dad it's ok. He is competative, but is learning not to blurt out that he can do what his older cousins can do. In September he will be going to a school with children with equal or more ability then himself. It will be a little shock for him, we are trying to prepare him.