Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Meeting with principal/update: first day not great

Great questions, mon. As a reminder, he is in first for about a third of the day (reading, writing, "morning work"). Two-thirds of his day is still in K.


I don't know. We did not request the acceleration, exactly--DS's teacher initiated it (her idea, but we okayed it) and when she did not get much movement, she asked us to try, so we also issued a request, which made things happen. It was a fast and easy thing once we sent one email. But I DO definitely worry that asking for anything would be seen as evidence that "it didn't work," which might hurt us next year. We are REALLY hoping for 1/2 split, but I don't know how likely it is. So if not, we would want him to continue to travel to the next grade up part-time.

I have only spoken to his 1st teacher once but from what she said, she absolutely thinks she belongs there academically.

In a way, I wouldn't care if he went back to K. He is not going to learn anything much in K. I have accepted this. That's not so terrible if he is happy and doesn't feel totally frustrated. But his K teacher felt like he was completely wasting his time and could at least pick up writing skills in 1st.

The question as to what he likes about school is a good one. He loves specials. He likes his friends. He likes earning good behavior rewards, which he does in spades (he is a pleaser). I think he likes some of the independent math games? Oh, he likes writing in his independent journal, where he gets to write his own stories.

Above all, I want him not to hate school.

Ultra, something else to keep in mind is that first grade teachers tend to spend the first quarter of the year teaching the kids to get used to the rthym of the work, including the increased expectations for doing written work. Your son missed that transition.

Have you spoken to the kindergarten teacher? She sounds like someone who has the pulse of your son. I'm wondering if she can help frame the situation for him.

I wish I could see the work he is doing--it would help me know what is bothering him. He doesn't say it's hard, but that it's boring. It may be very repetitive.

Talking ot the K teacher is a good idea. She has been incredibly responsive. But I feel like I am a burden to her even though she never gives that impression. I know that his move has been helpful to her, in that she doesn't have to worry about what he will do for that block of the day. But I think part of the issue may be that what she gave him was better accommodating his needs, even if she didn't always manage to give it to him. I saw this in the work she was sending home with him for reading (short answer response) vs what is coming home now (handwriting practice, phonics).

Well, yes, one on one instructional design will be better suited to a child's needs than one on twenty five.

I suspect that the 1st grade teacher spent 8-10 weeks teaching her first grade class to persist on the work they're doing now. A lot of handwriting learning is repetitive and requires stamina and persistence, and it takes time getting used to the demands.

My son skipped 1st grade. One of the big gaps was that handwriting. When he entered 2nd, he was not automatic on the formation of each letter, which greatly increased the burden of meeting the significantly higher 2nd grade writing demands.

I tend to get a lot of mileage out of starting my conversations with teachers acknowledging how hard it must be to serve the wide span of needs in the teacher's classroom. Stating up front that I recognize how hard it is to serve 25 kids all on different levels buys me a lot of discussion and problem solving time with the teacher. Empathy goes a long ways. Talented kindergarten teachers are very sensitive and talented at making sure kids learn to like school and see it as a place to learn. Have a conversation.

Thought I'd update and say that things are going a bit better. I met with the 1st grade teacher and she is a very interesting person. She acknowledged that there aren't any other kids in the class on DS's level, which creates some problems. However, she is reading some really great books with the class--I can tell she appreciates good kids' books--and she is not making DS do the work that he does not need to do, such as computer time (phonics work that is too easy for him). She also has some really great writing prompts set up that were creative and funny. I could see her thinking through some things to make stuff better for him even as we met, so I think it's good that we talked. On DS's end, I was able to see work from when he started in 1st (just a few weeks ago) and now, and can see quite a bit of progress in handwriting and writing conventions already, which makes me think that he is really benefiting from the move. So, we will continue with it and keep checking in with DS. Further talk with him also revealed that he has a bit of an identity crisis with feeling like he isn't sure where he belongs, and also feeling like sometimes he misses fun things in both classrooms. Both teachers are now aware of this and will work harder to make sure he doesn't miss really cool stuff. The other good news is that the "numbers game" looks good for there to be a 1/2 split for next year. I was also told that he will be placed with other kids IDed as gifted next year and that this is a school priority. Overall, I am impressed with the school's understanding of his needs and desire to work with him. Though he still is not receiving work on his true level, I did not really expect this. They are trying.

This is all very good news!

Awesome, it's always interesting to see updates with your schooling as our placements (and results) are so similar. Trying is such a strong position to work from.

Ultra, it really sounds very good! So glad you hung in there and figured it out.

Great news ultra!!!

polarbear

When they try they are often more open to other "unconventional" possibilities later on - I really hope that this works and grows in appropriateness for your son!