Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Advice needed on very difficult teacher

Update.

Principal called. He brought another teacher to the conversation. She said, "Mr. P. won't like this, but I had the same problem 15 years ago and I pulled my daughter out of her school so she could heal."

So, we know where she stands. <3 <3

Anyway, I gave him an earful and a half. I did not hold back. I told him that I'd been trying to be very polite about this matter and now was the time to be blunt.

I said that Miss T. was inflicting emotional damage on my daughter used the phrase OCD-like behaviors several times. I told him that she had no right and no business trying to intimidate my DD by telling her, "I don't know what you're telling your mother about me...." I also said that not only did someone need to pull the reins in on Miss T., I was shocked and dismayed that no one had ever done so in the past. He told me that he understood but that pulling DD from the class wasn't an option: "What will we write on her transcripts for high school applications?"

I said, "Fifth grade doesn't go on transcripts for high school applications and you know it."

He said, "Yes, but I'm looking forward to her next three years here."

I said, "Do not even think about next year. We have to solve this problem NOW. I am not going to subject my daughter to Miss T.'s OCD for three more years. I'd pull her out now if I didn't think that would do more damage than good."

I also said, "There is a list of accredited online math courses as long as my arm."

At some point, I said, "Wake up! She's terrorizing students and you're just letting her do it. I can't believe I'm the first person to complain about her."

He admitted, that yes, I was not the first parent to complain about things like stapling papers at the correct angle (!). I think this was actually what prompted me to say "Wake up!"

There was more. Much more. But you get the idea. He went from "There is no way this is going to happen" to "I'll get back to you after I talk with the owner of the school and the other teacher who was in this meeting. We'll find a way to resolve this."

Wow! That may be getting somewhere, at last! Keep us posted!

GOOD for you, Val.

It must have been really great to hear that even another educator was appalled by the classroom environment that this individual promotes.

Well, not great, probably-- but good to have validation.

No, it was great. She was, you know, sending him a message.

Nothing to add - but just wanted to say that you are handling this very well and I hope you succeed in getting a better math instructor for your daughter.

Hoping you achieve "best case scenario": child moves to other teacher's class. Yet there may be something disconcerting that in commiserating with you, the teacher shared she resolved her difficulty with the school by withdrawing her child. Hard to tell if the teacher's experience in changing schools motivates her to spare another's child from that... or whether the story was intended to be taken as a hint.

It must have been a huge relief to see another teacher break ranks like that! So affirming and I hope it finally spurs the principal to pull his finger out on this issue. Fingers crossed...

Great job Val. You kept your head and came up with great responses to each of the principal's assertions. Wonderful that the other teacher was involved. Fingers crossed here too.

Wow! Well done, and I do hope this turns into a great outcome for you.

I just want to let you know how much it helps to read your story. You are an inspiration to continue at any and every angle until something starts to work. Thank you!