Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy How to stop comparisons to pg by other g parents?

I think this is harder when they are young. My ds is at the HS and his age mates are not. Some parents do ask me how we got his placement. I simply say go speak with the principle and she will tell you what will be required from you. I will tell them it included IQ, ACT, and course exit exams for us. They surprisingly rarely go speak to the principle.

My younger dd6 is a hider to begin with and it makes it much less apparent to the tigers prowling around. I have had given names of specific books she has read if some ask. I will actually tell someone who ask specific questions that it is private information and my children would be mortified if I shared it. Which is honestly how my children would feel. My children see it as bragging to share and rude for someone to ask them. Telling them my children would be upset very frequently works as it points out the boundaries indirectly to them. I daydreamed about asking what their kids lasted grade is in a class just to annoy them

Could it be that she's just trying to figure out HOW gifted her DD is? Maybe you should suggest to her that she get her DD tested - or at least passive-aggressively comment how helpful it was to you to get DS tested etc etc so she gets the hint (that's what I'd do, you may be braver than me!)

But Mesoamericans are FUN, and Egypt is so... Cannon. Everyone knows about them.

Thanks for starting this thread! I don't have any answers myself, I am still pretty gobsmacked by a jealousy incident that came up in my own life a few weeks ago.

DS7 said something really sweet about a friend of ours that just moved to Canada - that he wished he could move next door to our friend because he missed him. A mutual friend of all of ours who really dotes on DS7 completely got his knickers in a twist, as in "How come your DS doesn't want to move next door to me?"

Both friends are grown men, so the fact that our friend expressed so much jealousy over the innocent affection of a 7 year old kinda freaks me out. My husband posted something about "Now now friend, DS just likes Canada way more than where you live." and left it at that.

My feeling is that now I look at our jealous friend a little differently, as someone whose got a hole in his heart that I can't fill and it's not my job to fill (NOR MY 7 YEAR-OLD'S). Healing from jealousy is an inside job.

I can however stay out of the trap.

Had one of these parents in regards to my PG son. She would be right in my face with questions like "what is he doing, what do you do to get him to do all this". I would try to back up but to get some space but she would back up right along with me....horrible. Wherever I went she would follow. I did have to tell her what DS was doing, because she would not back off until I did. I ended up just saying that he does it on his own terms with little involvement from me. This seemed to work. I mean, what can you say to this? I have no "tips". End of discussion.

Isn't one reason this forum exists so that parents can share information about curricula? If someone asks me how we afterschooled our eldest son, what do I lose by telling them about Singapore Math and EPGY? If they ask what specific levels of these curricula we are using, I can tell them that too. Whether they feel bad because their child is behind mine or superior because their child is ahead is not my concern.

Well, if it were me I'd simply come right out and respond, "Why do you ask?" Then again, I've never been known to be politically correct and seem to put people on their heels with how blunt I am

If the response is something like, "I'm just frustrated and I don't know where to go with my DD/DS ......." then I'd likely fill in and help as much as possible. I don't like to assume I know motives, however, intention plays a huge role in my mind as to how much time I'm willing to invest educating someone. I know what I say is often perceived in a manner that wasn't my intention due to my direct nature, I like to give others the chance to explain their intentions as well.

This? Is creepy. See the book The Gift of Fear and trust your instincts.

I agree! My creep-o-meter was pegging too.

Chalk this up to a third vote for, "Don't let that guy near your child."