Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy DD6 Near-Obsessive Interest in Cancer

Reading your post I just wonder if it's more a fear about dying than a fear specifically about cancer? My dd6 is only just becoming able to control her anxiety about death, but it has been an issue for her on and off for a long time. We speak honestly about it (yes it will happen, these are the things that you can do to be healthy, etc) and at a counsellor's suggestion, focus on the future - which seems to help. Of course I might be completely off track - but I just wonder, if it sounds like it might be a possibility, if dealing with that fear directly might do more to resolve it?

My mother died of cancer. That took about 7 years.

I deal with cancer people all the time. Most of the people I see are disabled from the chemotherapy.

Social Security has a listing of the severe cancers that grant automatic disability, basically because they are likely to result in death.

http://www.socialsecurity.gov/disab...0-NeoplasticDiseases-Malignant-Adult.htm

I don't have any advice on how to study the cancer issue.

I also wondered if a fear of dying might be what's beneath the surface anxiety over cancer - once I read your mention of severe food allergies. My dd10 has multiple life-threatening food allergies, and she's had some scary reactions. FWIW, the age around 5-6 years old was the time that anxiety over allergic reactions and fear over them really ramped up. I don't have any great advice re how to deal with that, but wanted to let you know that it later ramped down in a *huge* way once dd had been through the first few years of elementary school.

Anyway, might be totally off-point, but just thought I'd mention it!

polarbear

You all are the BEST! Thank you so much! It hadn't occurred to me before, but anxiety over death likely is driving her intense interest in cancer. She has had multiple anaphylactic reactions. She knows she has severe food allergies. She has been struggling a great deal over how food allergies make her different and how much they impact her life. She's never directly expressed fear over dying from an allergic reaction, but she must feel afraid. It would make sense that the fear of death would be expressed indirectly as an obsessive interest in/fear of cancer. I think I may try re-directing her to information that might help her feel more control over her food allergies and making sure she understands our plans for keeping her safe. For instance, I think I'll make sure she knows the signs of anaphylaxis and when an Epi Pen should be used and let her practice with expired Epi Pens on an orange. All those would be efforts to help her feel more in control, but my watch words are that adults must be responsible for her care and that a small child cannot be expected to manage life-threatening food allergies.

I, too, am an anxiety-prone worrier. Information is how I survive. I try to learn as much as I can, and I make plans. I think it's an adaptive approach. I think I'll just try to make sure I'm giving her information about both food allergies, which I think people have correctly identified as driving her cancer-interest, as well as cancer.

Thanks so much again!