Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Age or Ability Specific Forums Elementary School I just fell in love with a school

After my depressing visit to the local public school, this was like peeking into paradise. A tiny K-6 school with 48 students, in a charming homey building, with a focus on love of learning. They get a lot of super-smart kids, and challenge each child at their own level. They do music and art and cool science experiments and work on creating an emotionally safe environment of mutual respect. They don't do standardized testing. They do Spanish three times a week. They produce a literary magazine of the students' writing once a year. I want this school! It's even within my financial means (barely).

So now a little voice in my head is wondering whether I should consider skipping Hanni into K a year early.

In the "pro" column:

- Academically she is pretty much kindergarten-ready, with still a year and half to go. By September she'll be more than ready (academically).

- Her preschool is great for art and play, but in terms of academic topics (bugs, the seasons, space, dinosaurs) she is ready for so much more on any topic than what they offer.

- Even though this school tries to challenge each kid, I suspect she would still have her needs met better if she's grouped with slightly older kids. If I wait another full year, she may be bored by their kinder curriculum.

In the "con" column:

- Preschool may not be any great challenge for her intellectually, but it's a play-based environment, and I want her to have an abundance of self-directed play in her early years. So part of me wants to keep her where she is as long as possible.

- Her social-emotional development may not be up to speed for Kinder. She's definitely not there now (just rounding the corner to 4 years old), and I'm not sure she will be five months from now.

- If we give up her spot at preschool and then she bombs out of this school, then I'm really in a pickle.

Anyone else wrestling with this, or wrestled with it in the past?

I did something similar with my son and it did not go well. He was academically ready but not emotionally. It was a bad situation and there wasn't really a way out because his spot at the old school was taken.
So my advice would be to not pull her from the program she enjoys.

I haven't wrestled with exactly this, but I feel your dilemma!

I would guess that if it's a K-6 with 48 students it doesn't have year groups which are full (unless it's filling from the bottom and doesn't actually have any children in the higher grades yet)? My first impulse would be to talk to someone at the school about how much you love it, express a wish to put Hanni in it from Sep 2013 at the latest, and be open about your wondering about whether Sep 2012 would be better for her. See how they react to that idea; see how they react to an idea that if you don't put her in this year but end up wishing you had, you and they might at that point have a conversation about whether she might be better to join in 1st grade in 2013. Have they met H? It may help the conversation if they have... If they aren't full and you establish good relations with them, I'm thinking, you might even be able to decide to switch her in part way through next year at a point when you're confident she's socially and emotionally ready for K; that might end up being ideal. (IME, children can arrive at any time during the first couple of years and slot in easily - stable friendships that are hard to break into come later.)

Congratulations on finding such a great option, but I'd definitely be trying to keep the bird in the hand until it flies off!

Hi,

We are sort of in the same boat except DS is a year older. I won't go into all the reasons, but we are waiting another year to start the more structured traditional school experience.

His preschool has a K he can do next year, but it takes only a couple hours a day, it's pretty much self directed, pretty minimal in comparison with an all day traditional kindergarten, and he probably won't learn much. And then the rest of the time is more free play mixed with younger kids, sandbox and park, etc. He does not get bored with free play, spends 80% of his time in imaginary worlds... so he's very happy there.

But we are looking at ways to enrich the experience for next year.

We are thinking about paying one or more people to come in to the preschool weekly and do subjects in DSs interests. A language time for the older preschool and/or K age kids. And perhaps something else (anyone have ideas??). Ideally share the cost with some other parents but even if not it is small change compared to the distant gifted K which was best of the other possibilites we found for next year. (Our local K options are kind of dismal.) The preschool owner is really supportive and why wouldn't they be, it benefits them to be able to say they are offering things like that (even though it's full for next year it still looks good).

Have also thought about loaning or getting the preschool a computer so that DS can do some sort of learning activity that way... but not sure if that fits with the preschool director's philosophy.

Another possibility if those ideas aren't enough or don't work out as hoped, is having him go a couple days of the week as short days and lump some classes or homeschool type things in the free time.

I feel like there are ways to work with what is already a really good experience to make it appropriate for next year.

Polly

They cap the school at 48, and they have four classes. They do mixed-grade classes, and apparently it varies each year what gets grouped with what, depending on their mix of kids. They also seem to be very open to kids being in whichever group is right for them. For example, they mentioned that one year 5th and 6th might be grouped together, but there might be a 4th grader in there too.

I already blurted that out at the end of the visit, like a big dork! I did have a brief discussion with the K teacher about how I was looking for Fall 2013, and that H is ready academically now, but probably not social-emotionally, and the teacher's response (mulling over concerns about how to balance these things) gave me the impression that they're not horrified by the idea of a parent considering it. I signed up for a classroom observation, so I'll get another chance to test the waters.

I'm thinking along the same lines. If they don't fill their K class (and so far they only have 8 for a class capped at 12), I can contact them in September even, if it seems like H has really blossomed.

Thanks for your thoughtful comments!

Polly and KJP, I hear you. I'm realizing lately that Hanni is so sophisticated in her thinking that I am guilty of forgetting that she is still really really little. I think I owe her more time in an environment that is all about nurturing the emotional needs of 3 and 4 year olds.

Meg-Meg
The new school, is the K program full day or part day? How many hours of school would it be? Can you daughter skip K and enter the new school as a 1st grader? Are there school events that your family can attend while you wait to start to feel part of the community?

How many hours a day/week is she in her current preschool? Does she have friends? Play with everyone? Will she be one of the oldest next year? Does the preschool do it's own Kindy?

Is your daughter a self-directed learner - choosing her own topics of interest and delving deeply? Is she more of an agreeable sort who is interested in whatever is offered her? Is it the relationships that matter most, and the learning is one fun way to be close to other people?

Good Luck!
Grinity

Doesn't this mean that if your daughter starts "on dates" (2013) as a kinder she would still be grouped according to abilities, finding herself in a K/1st (or maybe 1st-2nd) classroom?

In which case the fact that she would be even more ahead academically wouldn't matter, right? Making your pro #3 in your original message not that strong?

8:30 - 2:30, with lots of time allotted for play, and an after-school program that I would probably use.

After K they spend more hours of the day on academics, and they start having homework (although it sounds like fun relevant homework, like talk to someone your family knows who immigrated). Which makes me think I don't want to rush her onto the K -> 1st train.

In answer to SiaSL's question, yes and no. I was chatting with the science teacher and he described how he tailored the topic of magnetism to each age group. What he described for the K kids (getting them to experiment with what it sticks to) just sounded way too basic. On the other hand, if I get them to put her in the 1st-2nd group, there will be more homework, more academic structure, etc., which I'm not interested in rushing. So it cuts both ways.

She's in her current preschool all day, and has friends, but there's a mean-girl triangle going on that I'm pretty concerned about. Next year she'll be in the pre-K group, and won't be the oldest in that group. Also, this preschool has a high proportion of at least MG kids (more than half are professor spawn). Hanni is an all-rounder, she'll learn about anything.

I think I'm talking myself into keeping her at the preschool.

Mr W (4y2m) is learning the periodic chart. I am teaching him what each element is and what the nomenclature means. We work on a new element every other day. It started out of a discussion of what fire was.

He is also asking how plants grow so the chart obsession fits right in. When I got to the part about photosynthesis he was able to grasp that is the opposite of fire because CO2 is split back into C and O2.

I do not think that things should be dumbed down for kids. Dumbing things down destroys the connections between things that allow their minds to grow.