Update . . .
We had a parent-teacher conference the next day, and the principal sat in on the meeting. Mostly we kept the plan the same, with a few exceptions.
MATH: DS will do math online, EXCEPT that he has to sit through the "explanation" part of first grade classroom math each day, and do some problems in the math book before he can go online. I'm annoyed about that, but DS was SO happy today -- he came home and reported that the self-paced program started him on division. The rest of the first grade is doing "doubles plus and minus one" -- as in 3+2 or 4+5. So he was delighted to do division.
READING: There will be a "high" reading group. Fortunately, my awesome DH asked to see the books they're going to be using. The books had about 6 words per page. We objected, and the principal said she could order "Junior Great Books" (I think it's called), 2nd grade level. I pointed out that the high group all read at least 3rd grade level books, but that was the best they'd do. Still an improvement.
SCIENCE: Teacher readily admitted that DS knows everything she teaches in science and then some, and is happy to let him read related in-depth books from the library during science time, and do Gizmos on the computer as well.
So we got something similar to what we asked for, and will hope for the best!
Paper trail created :-) Thanks to all.