I wonder if I presented it as a "temporary" trial-run, they'd be more open to it? Start it now and let it go until the new NWEA scores come out.
Trial - run is a great idea.
Also start practicing to translate your ideas into 'school-speak' -
They want to know any signs that he is unhappy and suffering socially -
So talking about his worry over and self blame over not being able to spell spherical might be a good one - shows that he is developing unrealistic expectations that are due to him not getting a reasonable amount of challenge inside the classroom (They may not instantly make the connection, though)
Any crying, stomachache or other bodily symptoms. Signs of stress, worry, fear will make an impression.
They don't get it that 'having it easy in school' is not something to envy, so you have to connect the dots and show how he is in pain due to 'too easy.' They have memories of breaking a mental sweat and how painful
that is. Try and get them to connect the dots that normal amounts of stress create growth as well as sad memories, and that your son is being denied the chance to get used to working hard. Throw in a few family examples that this is actually a problem. Very few people can coast all the way through their lives, and you don't want to bank on that for your son - you want him to experience the normal learning-associated stress along with all the other kids. Not too much but not too little. It's unpleasant but necessary. Try and find any concrete examples of this in your son to share.
Is he reluctant to try new things that he isn't instantly good at?
Does he feel that he has to be the fastest in the classroom in order to feel ok about himself?
Is he mentally equating 'smart' with 'effortless learning?' This is a set up for him have low resilience and quitting the minute the going gets rough.
Read through Tracy Inmanhttp's excellent - 'What a child doesn't learn'
http://www.wku.edu/academy/?p=430and see if you can find any little stories of your son that demonstrate these points.
School folks are people - people can move heaven and earth to help other individual people once their hearts are touched. You job is to translate all these ideas which make so much sense to us, here, into words that School folks will hear. They are still living in with their own experience of struggle in school, that they probably don't realize was such a gift - but it's possible that you will be able to help them see that challenge is natural to human development, and the fantasy of breezing through school is as much as a delusion as becoming a Pro Athlete or marrying the Prince.
You can do everything right and still get no where - that's why it feels so hard, because you can ask, you can beg, but the control in this situation is outside your power. (I've failed in the public school and felt that it was my fault. It wasn't.) It's great that your older son has found a school with a different attitude. Is it possible that the DS12's school has a connection with a school for elementary aged kids that they could make a phone call on your behalf and open some doors for your younger son?
Such a large proportion of IQ difference is genetic. Even if the school isn't aware of this on a conscious level, I think that most adults are aware that some families just seem chock full of bright successful kids. That might be better tree to bark up, yes?
Best Wishes,
((Mom-Salute from one Mom-warrior to another ))
Grinity
