Having worked in corporations, there always seems to be two groups of people. I don't know what to call them, but I'll just call them group 1 and 2. If the whole group is led by certain group 1 members, then group 2 members are often excluded for no apparent reason. Leaders from group 2 include everyone. There are no obvious physical or personality characteristics I can identify as a source of separation. I have some ideas, but I don't want to speculate.
Changing leadership (in your case, have another child or maybe an appropriate adult ultimately in charge) or having someone taking the role of coach seems to be the only ways I know of to solve this. I am a group 2 type and take on the role of coach if I see this happening. It is not that I am assigned the role, I just can't keep my mouth shut when I see these things happening. To avoid conflict, I don't make it overly obvious I am doing this though. One trick I have learned to get out information to the group 1 types is to put it in the form of a question.
I figured this was an appropriate opportunity to put out one of my less likely to be believed observations. As good a time as any to have an idea get summarily rejected without real consideration (couldn't resist the opportunity for humour).
