I agree-- the variance in recommendation/statutes is astonishing.
I, too, was first left alone for short periods (up to three hours) when I was between five and eight years old. Living semi-rurally, there was not much trouble that I could get into, and they figured I knew how to call 9-1-1 and the neighbors knew ME.
My husband recalls being "sent" to the local youth club with a younger sibling for the day, given pocket money to purchase a fast food lunch, etc. at about 8-9 yo. He was certainly left alone and in charge of his younger sibling at that age. In a busy Los Angeles suburb, no less.
Both of us recall being left alone even overnight by the time we were very young teens (12-14 yo). I roamed a foreign city with a friend at age fifteen, too.
Our child was not left alone, even for brief periods, until she was about nine. At that point, we began going for a walk with the dog around the neighborhood, etc. She can ALWAYS reach us by cell phone, and we have strict safety rules about what is, and is not, allowed when she is home alone. She also knows to which neighbors' homes to go if she needs to get OUT of the house (say, in the event of a fire or something).
The first time I left her alone for a bit and went shopping (about Christmas-time when she was 9.5 yo) she was inadvertently left longer than DH and I planned, because he was late leaving work. I checked in with her via cell phone about every 45 minutes, but she was clearly a little freaked out about being home by herself;
so to reassure herself, she cleaned all the bathrooms and mopped the kitchen floor! Sure wish I could reproduce that day!!
She has now (at 11.5y) been left alone for as long as 3 hours, but only in the daytime. I will ask her if she wants to go with me to run an errand; often she prefers to stay at home. I won't leave our small town, however, and leave her alone. Even though DH could be home from work in less than ten minutes. There's just something being more than ten miles away that I'm not yet comfortable with, though I can't say exactly why.
We live in a very safe neighborhood with many neighbors home at all times of the day or night. We have a dog, as well, which affords her a certain amount of protection.
