oh, my goodness Grinity, I have to play "the husband" card?! (not that I haven't ever played it before...)

I like what you suggest though, especially indicating in the email/letter that I'm unaware I'm asking for something difficult. That can often be a good plan = force people to explain to you their crazy rules, like that ones that make it difficult for parents and teachers to do the best they can for the needs of each child.

thanks for the sample letter!
beak