Jamie
i called the NY state dept of education from a number on their website and i got a FERPA "hotline" to ask about a ferpa issue. In my case the teacher claimed i could not come in to observe the class because it would be a violation of another child's FERPA rights to privacy. Which was total BS- they laughed at the hotline when i called it. I would at least make a call to your state and see what they might say. Also, i think that they might be saying no because you're doing it on phone and email (??).. have you tried writing a letter instead?
irene