Motivation is a huge part of defining HG+ kids. Ruf argues the major difference between level 4 and level 5 is motivation. So understanding what drives your child is important. I have recently discovered that my DD is not motivated by prizes. Her's is an Intrinsic Motivation. The desire to excel comes from within. One example that comes to mind is potty training ... we tried all the tricks to motivate her to potty train and nothing was working. We even bought a huge reward for her and left it in plain sight to remind her that she could have it once she is potty trained. It didn't interest her. She had to come to the conclusion that she wasn't a baby anymore and this meant potty training. When she did set her mind to it she was potty trained in no time. We literally had a couple of accidents. She was excited when she received the big reward but it wasn't what drove her to do it.
Chances are your daughter has the same kind of motivation. The downside to this (for us anyway) is underachievement. We watched our DD dummy down while in a social preschool. She bent over backwards to not stick out. It was so upsetting to watch because she would bring it home. We finally decided to pull her and put her into a more academic program. All was going well until a kid bit her on the nose. When we moved her over to the school she was not potty trained so she had to go in with the babies which definitely motivated her. She is now potty trained but her spot in the big kids class is not available until December. She has had major anxiety over going back to school thanks to being bit. I understand how upsetting it all is to her but at the same time we can't just give in to it either. So in my last ditch effort I tried to motivate her with a reward ... yep I tried to bribe the kid to have a good day today at school. I promised her that if she had a good day which meant no crying, hitting, or pushing ... examples of her bad day the last time she was in class ... we would go to the toy store and pick out something for her dollhouse. I should have known that wouldn't work but I tried. Hopefully since today is her last day of baby class and she moves into the big kid class she will let the biting go and be back to enjoying learning. Crossing my fingers!
