Thanks for starting such an interesting thread that hits close to home. My DD's in 1st grade too and perfectionism has been a big issue. It started at the end of last year when she started saying, "I hate math." I suspected it was because the math at school wasn't challenging enough and worked with her over the summer.
She went from "I hate math" to "More math!" Sure enough school's started, the math is stuff she's already mastered, and the negative attitude about math has returned. We're trying to keep her challenged by afterschooling and sending in appropriate level workbooks for her. The teacher lets her work in them after she completes the class work.
Another area we've seen perfectionism rear its ugly head is the AR test. The books she's given for AR are below the level she knows is "just right" for her. She gets upset if she misses a question on a Clifford test because she knows the book is too easy for her. I've explained that she's not really engaged in that book and Mommy couldn't remember if Clifford chased a bird or ball in spring either. The teacher has let her take some AR tests on more advanced books she's read. She's okay with missing questions on books she knows are more challenging.
I keep telling DD that what's important is not getting the right answer but that she's learning. I say, "Part of learning is making mistakes so it's a good sign that you're learning things when you make mistakes."
Remember that the PTA has a dual responsibility to fund-raise and advocate. When you advocate for your child you are paving the way for the children that come after her. You have a duty as PTA president and as a mother to advocate and not wimp out!
