DS was speech delayed and a rather intense little guy at that age. His inability to communicate just added to the fun because we usually couldn't figure out what it was that he was so ticked off about.
Some of the things that we picked up in speech therapy really helped us.
1. we came to realize that even though he couldn't communicate with us, he clearly understood everything that we were saying. His speech therapist was completely blown away by his comprehension (she was the first outsider that gave us hints that he was gifted).
2. choice - as indigo mentioned above choice was very helpful at diffusing things. We went out of our way to give him as much control as possible on the things that we could which ended up helping in the situations where we couldn't. It started as a way to encourage him to talk with us but ended up being more. We would offer 2 options for snacks, 2 options for clothes, 2 options for chores and he'd have to make an effort at vocalizing a response. In the end it helped me realize that giving him some feelings of control/autonomy were key to him and it helped when we got to the situations where I did have to lay down the hammer - you have to hold my hand in the parking lot for example.
3. communication - when we started speech therapy they started with 2 signs always accompanied by the word(s) and done near our mouth to emphasize the speech part - more and all done which really helped. Both were then used for books, toys, playing, food, drinks, etc.
Not sure if your pre-talking description matches our no-talking experience at that age but if you want more details about our speech therapy fun, I'm more than happy to share.
