A lot of you are really concerned about several aspects of my post. My main question wasn't really addressed. Believe it or not, my son is almost never unsupervised...because of how he is and because he's two. He has a nanny, both of his parents are very involved, and his grandparents. All of us work as a team to keep him supervised, engaged, and safe. We can't keep our eyes on him at absolutely all times, but he is always very nearby - never alone. I can't wrap him in a bubble. I can put an alarm on some doors, so I am up when he is. I can make his room as safe as possible, I can (and do) watch over him when he's using the higher-risk things.
He likes to wake us up 4 out of 5 days, but sometimes he just has an agenda. We've got a bell on his door and alarms on the doors to the outside now. We put magnet locks on the cabinets where the step stools are, we've locked the fridge, we've done what we can.
My husband, admittedly, is still adjusting to the constant supervision needs and our kiddo's other quirks. We are not perfect, but we're working with a specialist, he has lots of fantastic adults around him at all times that love him, and he's avoided injury and death thus far - so must be doing a decent job.
I was more hoping for support or advice when out in public or with other parents/kids because we are watching him like a hawk and DON'T let him do things that other kids his age do (like play in a nearby but out-of-sight room alone). I have parent friends tell me I'm not giving him enough space to be a kid. I'm hovering. I'm over-involved. Yet, despite these labels I feel like I'm still not doing what I need to to keep him safe (eg. the coffee incident) until he understands basic safety. That was more where I was going with my OP.
