Suevv, I'm going to kind of echo polarbear but with an addendum--
If I could have a do-over, I'd personally learn a lot more about "social skills" and share what I learned with DS much sooner. Here's why: even with an education/counseling background, I had no earthly idea what social skills are. If someone had suggested to me DS had social skills issues, I'd have attributed this almost entirely to his giftedness. He is gregarious! He is funny! He never met a stranger! <---well, until he became a tween and got all traumatized by his burgeoning self-awareness and withdrew...
Now, the more I learn about EF and social skills, the clearer it all becomes. And it is SO MUCH EASIER to talk to DS with the appropriate language. He used to tell me all the time that he was "irresponsible" etc. ICK!
The benefit to our kids being so bright is that they can handle a logical, scientific explanation to their challenges. As an example--if you are going to agree to the star chart (OMG, I have star chart PTSD), I'd explain to DS that this is positive reinforcement, etc., and how it's supposed to help him make new neural pathways.
I had a hilarious (but sad) conversation on the way to school with my kids the other day, telling them I've kinda dropped the ball with them, because I've trained them to ignore my requests by repeating them ad infinitum. DS very thoughtfully replied, "Yes, but it's not conscious. You have sorta Pavlov's dogged us."
It really does help make discussions easier, anyhow, because DS is very objective and does not get offended easily. That is one of the best parts of the quirky personality.
Also--if you haven't already, I'd suggest you read the 8 Keys to Raising a Quirky Kid book. It's not super deep, but it has a nice breadth of information (I'm being kinda silly--if you read it, you'll understand what I mean), and I think it gives some pretty succinct explanations of certain qualities. I'm going to use it to help my DS with his self-awareness, and you could easily be modify for a bright, younger child, methinks. Especially if you share any of his traits and understand them at a gut level.
