I think the problem is that you are overwhelmed by having him with you 24/7 and having to meet all of his needs all the time, particularly since you have RA and chronic pain.
So, you are going to need to figure out a way to get some relief from this stress and get someone to help with him, even if it is minimal, or it sounds like you are going to completely smoosh your physical condition, given your RA/pain/fatigue.
For starters, you should probably stop reading stories about wonderful, glowing, parents and the joys of homeschooling.
