she likes her current school because of her friends and she likes the private school because she actually learns stuff... I'm really torn as to what is the best answer here.
No answers, but a few questions -
Have you asked your DD who at the new school seemed like they might become new friends?
Have you thought ahead and discussed how children often change as they grow up... at age 11 or so many outgrow friendships and seek new friends.
Have you discussed that being bored in school may take a toll on her current friendships?
Does your DD see her current friends outside of school... sport teams, dance class, scouting groups, church/synagogue/temple activities, etc... which would naturally afford the opportunity to stay in touch?
She said she played with both girls in the 3rd grade class (only 2 girls, and 3 boys in that class). At her current school she has a few friends, mostly boys... but it's taken her until now to form friendships with kids that she actually plays with. So this is a huge deal. Up until this year she was pretty unhappy socially and would just walk around at recess or talk to the recess monitor. I think in a small environment she would feel more comfortable to be herself, but it would also limit her choices. She does do well with older kids and they all have lunch and recess together (at the small private school) so she could have them as options for friends as well.
I do arrange a lot of playdates outside of school. She has one friend that comes over frequently on the weekends and another girl she is getting closer to. The boys in her class really don't ever have playdates with us but it could be arranged.
She also is on a swim team and has some friends there. One of the girls on the swim team actually goes to the small private school and would be in dd's class.
My biggest concern is how limited our options are if went with this school and it didn't work out.
In the meantime I emailed dd's current teacher to request a meeting to discuss dd's unhappiness with math and see what the options are to resolve it.
