just a quick note to say thanks to everyone for your kind words. I met the Ed psych this morning who immediately agreed testing was appropriate for DD4, it was so lovely to talk to someone who didn't make fell like an attention seeking tiger mom. Regardless of the results, I now at least feel justified in seeking out help and that was what was stressing me out the most. What will be will be with DD and now we'll be able to get her the help she needs.