I'm so sorry for you both!! This situation really sounds miserable.
Honestly-- it sounds at least
possible that the learning environment that she's in is so inappropriate in so many different domains that I'm not sure that you
can get help from the school with this.
Not until you have a handle on WHAT you want them to do to improve the fit, anyway.
It doesn't sound like you know at this point, and (unfortunately) your DD is not at a place developmentally where she does, either.
Honestly-- I know that what I'm about to say isn't what you probably want to hear--
I'd consider homeschooling until she has the self-reflective/self-aware qualities that would allow you to HELP the school find solutions to problems with placement.(That assumes that you have little reason to suspect underlying 2E issues-- if you DO suspect those, even a teeeeeensy bit-- make phone calls TODAY to seek evaluation.)
She says she doesn't want to learn. She can be lazy, she is careless with her work at times and rushes to get it done. In class they have a math workbook and the teacher lets them skip pages and do what they want to do so she'll skip to the interesting things and avoid what she may consider to much work or require her to think a little more.
Okay-- this seems familiar-- does she have an explanation about WHY she doesn't want to "work hard" or tackle challenges?
When she begs to stay home she claims she will do school work at home to make up for not going to school. If I felt I could homeschool her successfully I would, but I don't believe it would be in her best interest.
If you don't mind, can you explain why you think that homeschooling would be bad for her in particular?
