Well, the more you agonize over it, the longer the decision is drawn out, and eventually the decision is made for you.
I guess I'd look at it this way:
1. would testing now be likely to change anything? If she tests very high? Lower than expected?
Well, if she tested very high then I would strongly consider skipping first. Lower than expected? Honestly, I am certain that *if* she cooperated and put her best effort forward she would at a minimum qualify for gifted (1 day/week pull-out). But, at least in dd12's 5th grade close to 50% of kids qualified, so I am skeptical of the program meeting her needs if she further to the right.
If no, I'd wait.
2. Would waiting for the CogAt be too late? If she does poorly, will you feel like you have no standing to ask for further testing? (Not that it is right to feel this way, but if you would, it would be good to know). This is a good question. I would certainly ask for further testing--I know plenty of kids (including dd12) whose CogAt scores were not as high as WISC, and whose achievement indicates WISC was more accurate.
3. If she did poorly on the CogAt, would the appeals process make her have to wait for the GT program longer than if she hit the magic score?
This is a great question--I don't know what the appeals process is. Good idea to find out now.
4. What is really bothering you? Are you afraid you will see her or her sister differently based on the scores? Look at what is really bothering you and address that. If it would affect your parenting in a negative way, then maybe holding off until you've been able to resolve that issue might be best.
This is a good question too, and I can see why you would ask it...but, no, I don't think this is the issue. I feel like I see her and love her just the way she is. I just feel like I am hyper-aware of gifted girls going under the radar and the negative effects that can have. If she is learning new stuff at school, and being challenged appropriately, I don't really care about a number on a test. But, I want her to have intellectual peers, good study skills, etc. etc. I mention that she is adopted because I think it is relevant that I can't make those assumptions re: full bio siblings having close IQs barring LDs. The two girls are SO DIFFERENT from each other that comparisons just don't happen--totally different temperments, personalities, strengths, interests etc. Like they are so different that comparisons don't happen, if that makes sense.
But, of course the experience with dd12 informs this decision. When she was 6 I NEVER would have guessed she would have DYS scores.
FWIW, mine are biological. Tested the 2E first, Found the E and also a pretty high (not DYS IQ). Had no intention of testing the other, but it was affecting our advocacy--holding us back-- and we actually were doing her a disservice in parenting her by not knowing. So we got her tested and found she was DYS and stopped labeling her "rage to master" behavior as competition or idolizing her brother and realized it was her own innate drive--which we then were free to nurture. If we had wondered if it was a one upmanship attempt on her brother, we would have continued to discourage her.
Thanks for the input. It is helpful to hear from other parents! Your experience with your dd is the kind of thing that makes me want to have her tested...but in such a way and at a time that we will get the truest picture.
