An update (in case anyone cares): once our DS8 learned we were visiting other schools, his behavior at school changed QUICKLY. His teacher said whatever we were doing, keep it up because it's working. He still has his issues but that surly/combative boy is largely gone. Yay! :-)
From a testing perspective, he is working with the psychologist on getting that coding score up and she says he is totally rocking it. Not sure if he took the initial test seriously or what but we are expecting the low coding to no longer be an issue.
As for school, we met with his next year's teacher who, God bless her, is trying as best she can to deal with the large variance in abilities. But when asked why the school does nothing with the top achievers on ITBS/CogAT she frankly stated that "we have a school full of kids who need remedial help. We don't have enough resources for anything else." That pretty much sunk whatever slim chance he had at returning to his current school.
We visited other schools and really liked a great and highly recommended Montessori school nearby. We had also all but given up on the local top-rated prep school due to cost. But when we submitted his application along with his test scores they became persistent. With a "what have we got to lose" attitude, we had him spend a full-day visiting and he really liked his experience. We simultaneously met with admissions who gave us a substantial financial aid package. We loved everything about the school - the experiential learning philosophy, ability groupings, math and arts curriculum, small class sizes, etc. but did not pursue because we assumed it was out of our price range. Their aid offer made our choice a no-brainer and we are very excited for him next year. Everyone involved thinks it will be a great fit. We are very excited how it all turned out.
Thanks to all who offered their opinions and suggestions. This forum has been a great help!
