I might be totally off, but I did find many of the teachers who were not actually trained in teaching gifted kids had some very limited, often biased ideas of what "all" gifted kids should be like.
We've had this same experience in our schools - even among the teachers who are specifically trained in teaching gifted kids.
We had a difficult time in elementary school getting our 2e ds placed at an appropriately challenging level in math. He has dysgraphia + a relatively slow processing speed but is clearly extremely gifted when it comes to picking up on math concepts and he loves math. What we did was to advocate as much as we could for appropriate work at school (which never worked) but at the same time we let ds do supplementary math work at home (which he was happy with because he loves math). We chose an online program that was aligned with state standards and included assessments and reports which showed exactly what our ds had mastered (and was also a program that had been evaluated by our school district and was found by the schools to be credible). Although it took us until middle school, once we got there, to that new school/new situation/new set of teachers, we were able to show "proof" of our ds' ability through the assessments and reports we had from his work outside of school, combined with his ability (IQ) test report, to successfully advocate for him to be placed at the level he was truly capable of working at.
Soooo... I hope you're successful much sooner than we were! The thing to do is just keep advocating, keep good records, examples of your child's work, testing etc. Don't give up. Some of the teachers you'll run into will be clueless and nothing you can ever say will change their mind. Some of the gifted programs out there aren't going to be all that great either - ultimately we found the gifted program in our district is more of a program for MG kids, not HG/PG kids.
It sounds like you are close to the end of your school year - try to stay encouraged - even if you don't get things worked out satisfactorily right now, next year will be a new year with a new teacher and hopefully the school staff will be more willing to listen and support your dd's needs.
Best wishes,
polarbear
ps - the whole concept of "show your work in multiple ways" in early math was just sooooo non-motivating for my kids (and would have been for me too, and I have a degree in math!). DS in particular thought it was ridiculous, why should he have to do it? My MG dd even thinks it's silly. I have to stop typing now or I'll proceed into a full-on rant about our school district's elementary math curriculum! Anyway, fwiw, once my ds go to pre-algebra and higher math courses, he was so much happier - that's where gifted kids who are strong at math concepts really start to soar.
