I thought it would be fun to start a thread about funny things that you child says or does. DS4 cracks me up daily. Things you post can be gifted related, or just amusing things they say/do. I love reading these things from other parents, they make me smile.

We like to play Quiddler at our house, and lately have been playing it almost every night. DD4 is really quite good...but sometimes he likes to make up words when he doesn't have real words. He tries to convince us they are words and will sometimes argue with us when we say they aren't. So he comes up with the word "han" last night and insists it is a word. Usually we look it up in the dictionary but it happened to be MIA that night. So we ask him what the definition is, he quickly states "you know..like when someone is saying something that you don't really care about you put your hand face up like this and you kinda look away and say 'han' " How funny, I guess it is similar to the "talk to the hand"

And one more funny thing is that he has been emailing me things that important to him sometimes. We will be sitting face to face and he will say "mom I need to go email you something" and then goes to his computer and tells me when he has sent it. Last night he sent me one telling me a story of how much the girl on wheel of fortune won, and how much she could have one. The night before he sent me an email with the subject "I am sad" the content said "I am sad that you won the game and I didn't" It's just amusing to me that he sends me email to tell me and doesn't feel like saying it to my face. Of course I always follow up with talking to him about it.

Cute!

My two children love board and card games. We play at least one each night. We decided to introduce DD3 to Uno several months ago, and while I knew that she understood colors and letters, I didn't think that she really understood the object of the game or the role of the non-numbered cards.

Anyway, for some reason, every time we had played, she was never the first to go. So one afternoon she asked if she could sit next to me so she could be first. I dealt the cards and turned the first one over. It was a Blue Draw Two.

She looked at the card, looked at me, and said "Mommy, I want J to go first"! I about fell over in laughter (and shock that she understood what that meant).

She is our comedian... the other night, he daddy was on the couch, and she jumped on him, said "Daddy, when I hit you, I want you to say 'stop hitting me'", and immediately after saying it, without any pauses, she slapped him in the face. Granted, hitting is not funny, but watching DH's reaction was hilarious! He had to get up because he was laughing so hard.

My kids are always asking questions about how/when earth was created, and who were the 1st humans, etc. I personally believe in evolution, but we teach our kids all the different theories. This was yesterdays conversation:

DDnew5: "Where did humans come from, mommy?"
Me: "We came from monkeys, it's called evolution."
DS7: "Some people believe we came from Jack and Jill."

LOL!! He meant Adam and Eve. I guess with need a Christianity refresher.

And last night DD5 and I made a quick trip to the library. The radio was on, and she was asking tons of questions about that. 1. Is that person, a real person 2. Are they singing right now? 3. What is a CD? 4. How do they get the music on the CD? 5. How does the CD get on the radio? and on, and on, and on......LOL

Great stories JJ's mom and RJH. And RJH, my DS4 used to always ask questions about music and cd's "who is that singing on the CD...do we know them?" "where are they?" That's pretty funny.

Around Christmas time DD, then 5, and I were talking about math and she was asking about even and odd numbers. I was trying to explain it to her when she suddenly said "Wait a minute, I know who even and odd are, they are the first people on Earth." When I corrected her, she then said, "well, Adam, Eve, Even, Odd, they sort of rhyme, that must be why I got them wrong."

This was right around Christmas time and we were singing Silent night to the radio when DH whispered "listen to what she's saying next verse." Well, rather than singing 'round yon virgin mother and child' she was singing "round yon vinegar, mother and child". I almost drove off the road laughing so hard.

I have a book of nursery rhymes that I have read each kid from the time they were babies. When DD4 was younger I used to read her the rhyme; What are little girls made of. What are little girls made of. Sugar and spice and all things nice. She would laugh and say she was mostly spice. The other day I was reading this rhyme to DS2 and DD4 leaned over laughing and said, "Mom, people are made out of cells, your going to confuse him."

My husband, 10 year old son and I were on our way home from a restaurant yesterday evening when my son started talking about how he liked Google Earth better now than he did a few years ago because of the improvements. I said, "Maybe Big Brother really could be watching us." He said, "Mom, haven't you heard? Big Brother HAS been watching us--since 1984."

He played Paintball with his dad and friends at a birthday party and he got shot with a paintball. It was the first time he had played and it was a little more painful than he had been told and not at all like being hit with a rubber band. He said he thought it felt more like being hit with an incendiary device and as he left the field he said to his dad and his friends "I'll be back after I "toughen up" a little." He knows that women sometimes excuse themselves to "freshen up" but as a boy he knows that society expects him to be tough so he had to go "toughen up."

GS9, in 4th grade, said all the 5th graders had to watch some "puberty" movie. He said they all said it was awful, and he didn't want to watch it next year. Thankfully, we were in the car and he was sitting behind me so he didn't see me choking back laughter.
A few days later he brought it up again, so I told him to look it up in the dictionary. We got interrupted, until an hour later when we were in the car again (I'm always taking him somewhere!). I asked him if he found it. He said yes, but didn't quite understand. What he didn't understand was what the big deal the 5th graders were making of it! He already knew the process, I'd just never told him the word 'puberty'!

We were driving by some farms yesterday, and saw a bunch of cows. DS5 wanted to know how the farmers got the milk from the cows. I gave him some basics. He asked about when the cows start giving milk, and when they stop. I told him what I knew. He said, "Mom, I think the cows are slaves." He said he hoped they all escaped soon. I told him I thought the beef cattle were a bit worse off than the dairy cows...

A budding PETA member, eh? Is he going vegan, then? LOL!

He has no problem with the no dairy, since he's allergic to it. But if you ask him what his favorite food is, he'll tell you "meat, any kind of meat." I don't think he's ready to go meatless!

hehe!

About a year ago, DS, then 4, was at my parents' house. My dad was so excited b/c he found a bird's nest on the curve of the down spout gutter on his garage. He of course was anxiously waiting for the right time to take DS to see it.

So they are in the yard, and my dad tells DS he has something to show him. Excitedly, he says something to the effect of "look, a bird's nest. How cool is that?" DS looks at the next, looks at him and says, "Actually (a favorite word for DS) Ah-pa, THAT is a robin's nest".

The look on my dad's face & the fact that DS corrected him still get chuckles from us a year later. hehe.

LOL!!! That's great!

My DD (2 1/2) makes me laugh out loud at least 4 times a day so I could be hogging this thread but tonight she was so over the top I just had to share. She was in her highchair eating a banana and had a stuffed dog she calls baby hops (She named it over a year ago after her dog Hops.) This is one of those kids that has been into imaginary play forever and it is nothing for her to have conversations with her stuffed animals and even imaginary ones all through the day but tonight was too funny. She had baby hops bouncing on the table of the highchair and then she put her hand down in had him bouncing on her hand telling him he was on a ball. (Changing voices to the high pitch one she uses for the other one.) Baby hops informs her "No it is the highchair." Quickly she replies with this look of horror on her face "Your right, my mistake it is the highchair. Silly silly me."

She also told us to leave baby hops water alone because if not we would be in 'serious' trouble.

Yay I love the funny threads!! Dd29m fell off the ladder at the playground yesterday and I guess she was a little stunned and couldn't think of the right word..."oops Mama, I...I dropped myself!" hahaha

On the way home from the playground she randomly told me: "mama, did you know that nut and butt rhyme?" We laughed a bit about that then when we got home she told dh "Daddy, I think you have a nut butt!" haha I don't know why that makes me laugh, but it is something I would call dh!

LOL!
My DD27m said something similar a week or so back...
She was upset becuase i had refused to let her do something and she was crying. She suddenly stopped, touched her eyes and said 'my eyes, my eyes...are ....BROKEN! and then started crying again.

It is a typical Minnesota spring. Last week, it was beautiful and in the 60's. Today, we go outside and it's snowing. DS5 says, in a deadpan voice: "Well. That was a short spring, summer and fall."

LOL, that's great. They would get along so well. : )

We were on spring break last week and went to visit some friends in the next state. As a rule when ever we go traveling I always pack a small bag of surprises for the kids for those moments of "I'm bored." Well, this trip I had brought a big package of pipe cleaners (chanel sticks?) (the fuzzy long thin bendable ones). On the first day DD6 made a flower out of a bunch of them. This flower then went everywhere with us. On the way home she informs us that her flower needs a vase becasue it is wilting. We were then informed that it would not be filled with real water but with little blue pieces of paper or rocks or whatever she could find in the car. Shortly after the vase was made of more pipe cleaners she asked for more to make an addition to her vase. Pretty soon we had a vacuum cleaner out of pipe cleaners. Well she was so excited about inventing a new thing that she wouldn't stop talking about it. Fast forward a couple of days. We're back home and she wants to show her teacher her invention becasue she mentioned it in her journal that she had to do for school. We both thought it would not be a good idea to take the actual vacuum to school so she had me take photos of it.
The next day at school she proudly shows her teacher the photos and explains the whole thing to her. Well, the teacher asks her which part sucks the dirt up into the vacuum. Well, she apparently gave the teacher a look of bewilderment and said "You do know this doesn't really work don't you? It is only made of pipe cleaners." Well, I guess the teacher nearly fell over laughing.

that's too cute Kerry!!!!

My DD2yrs old loves to look at insects under the microscope. My friend was over and she was looking at the tick we pulled off of DS8 a few days ago. I was changing DD's diaper when she kept whining about something. I asked her if she was ready for her bath. She said, "No, I want to see the tick!" quite emphatically! It was all I could do to stop laughing!

LOL! Love that! Scientists in diapers!

Here's DS4's funny for the day...

He tells really dumb knock-knock jokes that have no point, much as all kids that age do. He's also totally unaware of pop culture byond Spiderman and Pokemon. Yet DS4 tells the following joke, which DS7 swears that DS4 invented on his own:

DS4: Knock knock
Me: Who's there?
DS4: Y'all.
Me: Y'all who?
DS4: I'm Brittney Spears, y'all!

Okay, I'm laughing at it all over again right now! Here's this goofy little boy doing a Brittney Spears impression...and I didn't even know he knew who she was!

I laugh and laugh!

Kriston - that's definitely worth a good belly laugh!!!

I'm very happy to see that DD definitely enjoys science, looking for critters, digging in the dirt, loves hiking and looking under logs for salamander eggs! She also LOVES the microscope. It's on her little table and it's the perfect height for her when she's kneeling on her little chair. Unfortunately, she lost the tick and it was a perfect specimen that I wanted to add to our collection. Sadly, I"m sure there'll be another tick soon as much hiking as we do in tick-infested woods. EWWWW.

How funny Kriston. My DS4 tells similar jokes. I really ought to start writing them down. He started them at 2...they literally made no sense then. Now they are starting to make a little more sense and can play on words more.

That's cool dazed and confused about the interest in critters outside. (although I must say that ticks gross me out). We plan to do some camping this spring and summer. Both of mine like the outdoors a lot, but we haven't done any camping with them yet and I really miss it. I am looking forward to it.

This morning in the car he was humming along with classical music. He says to me "do you know how I can sing two notes that are the same note at the same time?" I said no. He says "it's easy, because they are the same note, so I just sing one note like this, but a little louder..." and proceeds to hum a note. He keeps things interesting.

Mr W will talk to himself while he plays. It goes like this.

I feeg he wa.
He feed he wa.
They feed he wa.
HAHAHAHHAH!!!

Be ti uh guy.
Get fer dwer.
HAHAHAHAHAH HEEEEE! HEEE!!

It will go on for ten minutes. Several phrases, followed by side splitting laughter.

I always enjoy someone who can crack him/herself up!

DD 27 mos. is in full imagination and fantasty mode. Yesterday, after saying goodbye to DH as he headed off to work, DD commented quietly, "Daddy left and he's never, ever coming back." I said oh really? Where is he? She said, "He's with Suzy and Chris (his colleagues), at the bottom of the ocean."

(Dazed, just wanted to add that while we were at the beach this weekend a giant, black beetle crawled out from underneath me. DD let the beetle crawl all over her like it was a kitten. I named it Steven. Turns out Steven is a Darkling and quite friendly. We must get a microscope.)

I'm never really sure how far to go in answering computer-obsessed DS3's endless questions...

Last week, after listening to my stomach, he announced that he could definitely hear a baby. After explaining that I was not pregnant, he asked how we could put a new baby in there. So, I tentatively tried to explain how babies grow inside women from cells so small we can't see them. DS says 'oh, I get it' as he starts rubbing his hands together over my abdomen and then says 'There, it's done. I made a baby and put it in your belly button!'. That's what I get for omitting some important reproductive facts!

Fast forward 10 hours later, when DS randomly announces 'This is taking forever... I just can't wait any longer!' When I enquired as to what he was talking about, he points at my abdomen and says 'Your baby. I can't see the bump yet, so it must be still loading!'. Tell me where I went wrong with this topic LOL

Ahhh, this is a great thread!

Thanks everybody, I needed the laughs!

peace
minnie

Ah, TMJ, you remind me why I tend to err on the side of offering too much info rather than too little. ROFL!!!

(Not that giving too much info isn't rife with problems of it's own, mind you! LOL!)

DS4 said a couple of funny things this morning that made me laugh. Here are a few of his quotes

"I just saw an tree with lots of little easter pinatas hanging from it...or maybe they aren't pinatas, maybe they were just decorations"

"saying the word 'bahamas' reminds me of eating a mushed up banana that tastes like mashed potatoes"

Of course right after saying that last sentence he moved on to Math and mile markers. The things that come out of his mouth sometimes are quite strange and amusing.

Mr W found out how to throw overhand two weeks ago.

He does it with everything he can pick up now. Its rather dangerous to be downrange of him.

Last night he picked up a ball and threw it at the wall. It came back and hit him in the head. He just looked at it.

The next thing he grabbed was a 4 oz can of evap milk and did the same thing. It went straight up in the air, came back down, and hit him in the head.

He fell over and hit the floor pretty hard. He did not cry, but laid there on his stomach, kicking a leg into the floor.

Then, very clearly, he said:

"Ouch!! That really hurts!!" and then,

"That was pretty stupid, huh?"

I spent today setting up for our public library's book sale. After school today DD6 joined me. She was pretty disappointed at the amount of children's books this year, so she promptly announced that there were not enough books for sale here, and ran off to find the childrens' librarian to ask for paper becasue she needed to get right to work making more books for the sale!
She's got 2 going now and has assured me that she will have them ready for the start of the sale Sunday.

DS5 cracked me up earlier today. He has a head cold, so he is a bit stuffed up. As we were eating lunch, he said, out of the blue and sort of annoyed, "Why aren't my antibodies killing the germs?"

This thread is funny!

When my son was around 20 months old at the time and wanting to know the name of everything. We were eating in a booth next to a window and he started pestering his younger cousin when I told him to "Please eat your chicken."

He had an inquisitive look on his face that made me wonder what was wrong.

He pointed to his plate and said "Chicken?"

I said, "Yes. Eat your chicken."

He then looked outside the window and pointed at some pidgeons and said, "Chicken?"

I think I was trying to hide the look of dread on my face wondering if he had made that connection of eating something that was alive.

I told him, "No sweetie. That is a pidgeon. Now eat your chicken."

DS6 went to a new friends house for the first time yesterday.When he got there he found out the his friend's Dad was a big time astronomy buff. There were telescopes everywhere! He even has a telescope that sent digital photos directly to his computer.

When he found out DS is fascinated with space he offered to show him some things. He showed him the sun complete with plasma arcs during the day then called to see if DS could stay until it got dark. I agreed to show up a little later than planned. When I got there they were out looking at Saturn and several of the moons. Mr M was telling DS all about Saturn and the moons surrounding it. He said something about one of the moons having liquid in the form of lakes and DS turned around very calmily and said "I'll have to get back to you on that, when I've had time to check your facts". then turned back to the telescope.

Love hearing about your sweetie-pie!
Grinity, Grinning to infinity

One more. DS4 and DS6 both asked for an apple yesterday. DS4 happily snatched his apple and ran off. DS6 looked at the apple, then looked at me. "You need to cut it up" he said. I said to him "Your 4 yo brother doesn't need it cut up, he eats a whole apple just fine, you can too". I started back to what I was doing. Next thing I know DS6 is back in front of me with the apple. "Mom, that's the point, he's only 4" "He hasn't gotten to the part where his teeth start falling out yet, DUH!" DS6 is missing his bottom teeth and therefore can't bite his apple! DUH!