We have tried quite unsuccessfully to advocate for acceleration with the public board. I have gone up the chain and my request is falling on deaf ears. Never have they responded with any child-specific comments. Rather, I've just been shut down period.

How do you know when to give up and just go with the private option? We are strong public system supporters but I am quite jaded by the fact that they won't even consider (or give the appearance of willingness to consider) our requests.

We have very strong reasons for request - early birth date, psycho-ed report, strong academic performance.

IMO, when you are tired of dealing with it and have a viable alternative, that's when you move on to option B. If the other party refuses to listen to reason, there's really not much point in continuing.

That said, thoroughly check out the private school's willingness and ability to accommodate before signing a contract. We've been at three private schools, two have been good/very good, one was horribly rigid/downright mean.

You may have read this elsewhere in the forums, but in case you have not... when it comes to acceleration, there are excellent resources at the website of Acceleration Institute, which includes
- A Nation Deceived,
- A Nation Empowered,
- Iowa Acceleration Scale (IAS), reviewed on Hoagies Gifted Education Page here.

These may provide both research and a process, with which to approach the school.

What type of acceleration are you seeking? Whole grade acceleration? Single subject acceleration?

It sounds like you've probably hit the point to give up with your current school district.

Investigate your private options - some are great and some not so much. Also, if this is possible, look into your neighboring school districts. We've found completely different attitudes to acceleration simply by crossing an arbitrarily drawn line on a map.

Best of luck,
--S.F.

1. when you think that your child's future, intellectual growth and education are affected
2. when you think that you have better things to do with your time than advocacy (as in a job situation that will not allow you to spend time on gifted advocacy)
3. you live in an area where there are excellent private schools as well as excellent after schooling opportunities
4. when you are sure that the best the school district could potentially offer will not come close to what your child needs in terms of acceleration or instruction.
5. when you feel that your child is wasting his time every day by being physically present in a classroom because he is made to do it and he knows more than what he is "supposed" to know at that grade level.
I reached all these points and decided to move on to private schools.

The first thing that I noticed is how much "more" the teachers are able and willing to do for a lower pay scale at the private school (e.g. yard duty, curbside drop off supervision, decorating classroom for festivals, running math bees and spelling bees, making their own photocopies, teaching without aides) - I am mentioning this because I spent a year of my personal time volunteering for these things at my PS where the teachers were whining about budget cuts and hence needing parental help for these things!

I got better response for my questions from private school, they accounted for every minute of the day that my son spent there (no wasting time at all), my son got "extras" that he could not have gotten in addition to the acceleration in curriculum (computer programming, music specialist, foreign language, sports specialist, character education, science labs etc). I am happy to not be dealing with PS anymore and spend more of time on my career related issues these days.

As Frog says, investigate your private school options - shadow their classrooms if you can. In our case, we made 3 moves before things clicked - but all the moves were progressively better for my DS.
Good luck.

I just wanted to wish best of luck on finding a good school. When public school option doesn't work out, a good private school can be way to go.

My older one (4th grader) is in public school (gifted program) and younger one (1s grader) in private school.

One major difference in our experience is that they listen to you much better in private school. They always try to come up with a solution.

When researching for private schools, make sure to share your concerns and your expectations. There are many good private schools, but as many as not so good ones.

We were hoping to have DD skip SK so she can go straight to grade one French Immersion. We just found out the other day a private school focused on gifted kids will take us.

I guess we are just a little uneasy to have to potentially commit a large sum of money for private school when we see a perfectly viable option down the street from us.

I considered getting nasty with the school board and taking them to court (not only would they not accelerate, they would not identify either saying they will only do it after age 8).

I don't know what else I can do? I sent a letter to the superintendent yesterday citing my reasons, complete with picture of my child on top to get her attention. I hope they at least make a good faith effort and consider MY CHILD instead of just saying it's not "age-appropriate" and slamming the door.

Have you check the state and local statutes as well as Rules & Regulations regarding acceleration and early entrance? Is your DD's early birthday within the exceptions provided? For instance, in our state, when the statutes gradually changed the birthday cut-off from December to September, it provided a small window of 15 to 30 days (don't remember exactly) for early entrance. Basically, the laws otherwise prohibited early entrance to a public school but did not specifically prohibit acceleration once the student completed first grade (I think) or so. Parents have been known to send their kids to private school for a couple of years and then try to transfer to public, assuming they could find a private that will allow early entrance.

Anyway, whether I would give up depends partly on whether the public board is following the law.

We are in Canada so the law is a bit different and doesn't provide for early entrance. While the Act is silent on acceleration, it really is up to the discretion of the school board and/or principal. It is just not "common practice" I have been told and they just refuse to consider the issue altogether.

As to whether they are following the law, I take issue with the fact that the board is refusing to identify giftedness until eight years of age. Under our laws, giftedness definition has no age stipulation and in fact there are other school boards that have recognized and identified gifted kids in the primary grades. So I could try to challenge that, if I have stamina...

If you choose to go to private until age 8, can you still request testing in public school at that time and make a switch if they provide a good option for you? Or does your DD attend to the school to be tested?

As Quantum2003 mentioned, going to private school and switching to public school when gifted program is available is very common scenario. That's our plan too. My son (1st grader) will be tested this year and if he is accepted into the gifted program, we will switch to public school.

I'm in Canada too (Ontario). We started our son in public school for JK and SK, but despite an IEP, he was desperately bored and unhappy. We had him tested so he was identified as gifted and the school's plan was... more of the same. Their greater (only?) concern was social skills. When I tentatively asked about acceleration, they warned me of its perils and then rhapsodized on differentiation within the classroom, despite the clear evidence that it wasn't working for our son.

In my city's public and Catholic schools, there aren't any gifted programs, and acceleration is extremely rare. It's all supposed to be covered by differentiation within the classroom which translates to "not much of anything" unless the teacher is really exceptional.

I researched all our options and we chose to move him to a small private school. We have never looked back. He was accelerated, was therefore more engaged, and then he made friends without difficulty. It was amazing.

The first school closed a few years ago and we moved to a second small private school. It has also been great. In our experience, both private schools have been far more flexible and accommodating than the public or Catholic schools. I'm sure it depends on the school, but in our case, it was definitely the solution and well worth the money.

Side note--we're non-religious in a religious school. It's been fine.

Good luck! I remember how awful it was when DS was so unhappy and bored and what a great relief it was when we found a solution!

I urge readers not to assume that "going private" is any solution. Private school staff can be just as bloody minded as public.

See for example http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/private_pg.htm Even private schools that use the word gifted, let the buyer beware. They may for example, not want 2E, or dyslexia. They may not want PG and up. They may claim to understand SEN of GT but if they have a line of applicants just instead choose kids that seem more docile even if they're less gifted.

The only way to have control over the teacher and the curriculum is to home school (possibly mixing in part-time tutors).

I refer you also to my post on School Administrators as Politicians http://giftedissues.davidsongifted....ool_Administrators_as_Po.html#Post223853

Many are either ignorant, willfully ignorant, or ultimately, just choose to ignore, stonewall, or give at best lip service to an issue (GT) that affects only 1% of their stakeholders (and threatens the other 99%).

Hear me now, believe me later. -Hans and Franz

I want to echo what is already said by other people: don't assume a school is better just because it is private. The quality of private schools and their teachers, and their understanding of GT students have huge variations. My DS was in a reputed private school for GT kids for 1.5 years, and we were very, very disappointed.

I think this is why many of us have encouraged the OP to look into their options. There are bad private schools, and there are good privates. Just as there are bad public schools, and good public schools. So far, we're 1 for 2 with publics and 1 for 1 with privates (good over total). On both the public and private side we avoided some we felt would be a bad fit. Sure we were lucky to find a good private and, later, a good public fit, but good research made it easier to get lucky.

Best of luck,
--S.F.

Thank you everyone for your thoughts.

I am very scared to be making a wrong decision and picking the wrong private school. However, having talked with a handful of parents in the past week, the private gifted school option is looking more and more appealing.

That said, I have a meeting with the school's superintendent this week, so we will see if she is open to considering acceleration or not. If she isn't, I've decided to give-up and just go try the private school out. Even if she is, we still have decisions to make because I am partly convinced the private school might be a better fit.

I really don't know.

If you're anything like me, the fear of making the wrong decision will not go away any time soon (it still hasn't). Just don't let that fear paralyze you into making no decision. To me it would be better to act and be wrong than to passively fail. You have to trust in your instincts and try to plot the best (often least-worst) course available to you.

Best of luck,
--S.F.

We do gifted private and for us it works well.

I was in a similar situation to yours last school year. DS was so across-the-board advanced for Kindergarten at that school that the thought of him not being accelerated to second grade there was really frightening. To me, acceleration was the minimum acceptable response from the school for him... yet that suggestion was met with so much resistance from his principal, teacher, and gifted coordinator that I saw the up-mountain battle looming directly ahead of me.

When I received the acceptance letter from the gifted school, I learned that I had to make a decision about enrolling him there mid-appeal at his public school. It was an agonizing decision, partly because I had bought into the idea that the public school could provide an appropriately challenging education for him if given the opportunity. But... throughout the year, they had verbally assured me they could do this yet kept demonstrating that they couldn't. While I would have liked to have seen the appeal the entire way through, turning down enrollment at the gifted school would have meant risking no acceleration at the public school.

It was an agonizing decision, and there were times I felt like I could barely breathe. But then I told myself, "Hey, I'm only committing to this for a year. If this doesn't work out, we can try something else." And that was very reassuring to me. I knew in my gut that "giving up" at the public school (I felt that way, too) was the best thing for us as a family.

He's been at his new school for a few months now, and it's a really good fit for him. Those fears about making the wrong decision have subsided.

Good luck to you!

*** UPDATE ***

So our meeting with the superintendent went as well as it could. She basically said nothing could be done at the kindergarten level as it is an optional program in our district. Therefore, she *hinted* we could go private for a year or more and try to come back, at which point they could not deny her entry into the accelerated grade.

Decisions, decisions, decisions...

Do I opt for private gifted school or try to have her stick it out for another year for the French Immersion program which is a grade one entry? I'm beginning to question whether immersion will keep her engaged in the long run, I hear a lot of kids get bored with it.

Can you move on to another district and try there?