Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy New here... Question

My name is Amber and I have a "gifted" son. I got the rec for Hoagies' website, and read through it a little bit. I still feel alone in this whole thing. I feel like my son is not getting the attention he needs at school.

His teacher is sending home homework that could be done by my 3 year old. When I asked her if this was going to be the norm, She acted like I hurt her feelings, and told me "well the homework is elementary, because this is elementary school" (not exactly what I meant by elementary... )

I just don't know what I can do to keep him enriched, keep him learning, without school holding him back. He's in first grade, but he is very young. He's only 6, just turned 6 in July. So moving him up a grade is not an option.

Just looking for a few pointers about dealing with school, and different things I can do at home to help him keep learning the way his brain is meant to learn.

Thanks!

Hi Amber.

I see that you live in Austin. Does your son go to school in the AISD? Depending on your school district there are gifted programs and some start in Kindergarten. Have you asked to have him tested or looked to privately test him? There is a gifted school in Austin: ACE Academy but of course it is private with the cost of tuition.

My advice would be to see about the gifted programs in your school: when do they start and how do they determine eligibility. I know you are fearful of acceleration and if this is not a route you want to consider you can always ask for enrichment: harder work to be given to him in class. Maybe even a pull out for his stronger subjects.

My DD is 4 and we have already decided public school will not be a good placement for her. She goes to a private Spanish Immersion program full time and we plan to keep her there through 5th grade (so long as it remains a good fit).

I wouldn't rule out a grade skip based upon him being younger for grade. One of my girls has a Sept. bd (so turned 6 shortly after starting 1st) and she did wind up skipping a grade later (5th). Prior to that, we found subject acceleration to work well for her. Subject acceleration entails sending the child to the next grade up (or more) for a single subject (or more than one subject) while still having him/her remain in the standard classroom for the other subjects.

Other than trying something like that, I'd look into when the school assesses for giftedness, what the criterion are to be so identified, and what types of services they provide for the kids who are GT ided.

My youngest (late Sept. bd) won't be skipping any grades both due to her age and size and b/c it isn't the best fit for her personality, etc. She is being subject accelerated in math and has a GT reading class daily that replaces the std classroom work. That seems to be a good fit for her and sufficiently challenging at this point. She's a bit erratic in any case, so we wouldn't want anything more right now.

Some GT programs don't replace the std classroom fare, though. Instead, they are things like weekly fun activities where the kids do experiments or play games. That usually isn't the best bet for fully engaging a gifted kid.

Thanks for the advice. He is in the GT program at school and in the accelerated reading program. But that program is a class based thing, meaning he never leaves class. He is just in a group with kids that read around his level.

The reason I'm asking is because his behavior is starting to become a regular problem in his class and I think it's simply because he's bored. He'd rather goof off, then have to sit down and color. I gave him a puzzle over the weekend (100 piece, small-medium pieces) and he completed 80 percent of it all on his own.

I don't know what to ask the school. I asked his teacher about his homework, and she acted like I was asking too much. Private school is really expensive and I don't have the luxery of staying home and home schooling him.

Katelyn's Mom, he goes to Leander ISD. Which is supposedly a good school district, btu I don't feel I'm getting much support, or maybe I'm not talking to the right people?

I believe that it has been mentioned here before, but there are times when the districts which have a reputation of being "good" are not the best fit for gifted kids. They are deemed "good schools" usually b/c they don't have a lot of non-proficient kids and they have a reasonable number of kids who test advanced.

For that reason, it is not terribly hard to find a good number of kids who read above grade level, for instance, like in your ds' class. The school may, therefore, feel like they are doing fine placing the gifted kids in the top reading group in the class or the top math group, and so on. Since there are other high achievers, unusual measures are not often taken for a child who is different.

How about suggesting that you would fund a program like EPGY if he could work on it independently at school or would he not do well with independent work of that sort at his age? Would they be willing to try sending him to 2nd grade for just one subject like math or reading?

I'm going to go talk to his GT teacher on Wednesday and maybe the counselor to see what our options are as far as getting some second grade work and seeing how that goes. I was reading on the website and for TRUE accelorated programs through the school the child has to be tested in the first six weeks of school.

I don't want to be the annoying parent that thinks my DS needs special treatment, and that's what I feel like.

We live in Lake Travis ISD and the elementary school in our neighborhood is suppose to be the best in all of Metro Austin. Yet when I talk to friends who have some older children going to the school it is clear they fit the 'great' school description due to high achievers. One friend has a son who was reading before Kindergarten and he is in the gifted program. What she described to me would be torture for my DD. It doesn't come close to meeting her needs. All of my friends who know DD have all voiced the same opinion. There is no way the public school could keep up with her without serious grade skips and we aren't comfortable with that choice.

I know you don't want to be the 'pushy' parent but follow your gut. Clearly you are seeing something of concern or you wouldn't be researching your options. Advocating for your son will not be an easy road but one worth all the effort. Please keep us posted on your meeting. I hope you find them willing to work with you.

I guess I'm looking for questions to ask. Things to say. I am so new to this, and I feel completely out of the loop. I don't want to be the pushy parent, but it might come down to that.

You sound like me this time last year My son is now in 2nd grade (turned 7 in June). I think asking for your son to go to 2nd grade for math and/or reading would be a good start. My son goes to 3rd grade math 4 times a week, and also gets his own spelling list each week (5th grade). He doesn't get homework, but I did enrol him in EPGY math online, so he usually does a session or two of that in the evening. He also takes in his own books to read during "quiet time". Good luck

He probably does need special treatment. Giftedness is a special educational need (in my book anyway) - I don't really believe in asking a teacher to make a whole lot of changes to 'what she does that works for most kids' for one kid, because I think it is rude - that leaves asking for your child to be tested to see what setting already exist that are a match for him, and moving him there. Especially if he is starting to act out.

The early meeting are usually
1) identify the problem - child acts out, we aren't sure why
2) come up with an action plan to figure out the roots of the problem,
then in future meetings you
3) come up with action plans to get at the roots
and
4) try the plans out

Love and More Love,
Grinity

Check out this thread of the expanded version

http://giftedissues.davidsongifted....at_to_do_with_the_numbers.html#Post89610

I wouldn't rule out a grade skip either. I don't know if sports is an issue & I know TX is supposedly big on red-shirting, but DS was young too. He started K at 5 (turned 5 in June) and ended up skipping. We worried about the age too but he's in 4th now & doing great academically. Socially he has some buddies and is happy. He still needs challenges though but it's not as bad as it might have been.

Thank you all for the support. I talk to his GT teacher tomorrow. I might also stop in and talk to the counselor. Thanks again!

Amber

Amber,

To be a successful advocate, you probably will come off as a pushy parent. Ask that he be tested and ask for what he needs. If you spend any time on here you will read lots of stories about people who not only had to push, but push hard and for extended periods.
The key to success is knowing the law in your state, and knowledge about the educational needs of gifted kids. It can be done but in most cases it really is "the squeaky wheel" that gets results.
My son is grade skipped 4 years with further acceleration in math. This is a state that has nothing in place to take care of GT kids. So hang in, be pushy and vent right here any time you need to!

I spoke to DS' GT teacher yesterday. She said he is right on target where he needs to be and accelerating in areas in her class. She told me he was a very bright kid,a nd she really feels that the GT program is where he needs to be to enjoy school.

She told me a few stories that gave me some insight. First, I already knew, DS is still young. He's still immature. He is going to test his boundaries to see how far he can push the adults around him. Also, he feels like he has to prove something. She said when he got up to do a presentation on a project they were doing, he got shy and started acting silly, talking really soft, and all in all pretty much clammed up. Not so much he felt intimidated, he did the presentation, but he got shy (my kid shy?! seriously??)

She told me that for a young first grader, in his first year of GT, and being noticed as a gifted child, he is exactly where he needs to be with everything from behavior, to learning, to overcomming his shyness.

They have SEVERAL words they use in the class, that he would have never seen outside of the program. They see these words every day and in their projects they have to do these things (elaborate, transform, and several others)

Overall I was very pleased with the conversation we had, and that he is infact benifiting from the program.

I'm glad to hear that the GT teacher was able to give you information that helped you feel comfortable. That's great!

I'm confused now:
Is this the same teacher who gives him 'elementary' homework? How much time does he spend with the GT teacher and how much time does he spend with the 'elementary' homework teacher?

Anyway - I'm hoping that better homework is coming!
Smiles,
Grinity

No, his GT (or qwest) teacher does not give him homework yet. They have several projects that they do in class, but no homework yet. They have a huge project coming up that will require work at home. He hasn't really had any homework since I spoke to his regular teacher!