Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy ok to not challenge son for two years?

I�m new to this site, so feel free to give me input on the format of my post or how to use this site. Seems like a great site, BTW.

My 9 yr son is all around gifted with iq 147. He�s at his 4th grade level in a Montesori school where he gets little challenge, despite my protests.

I�m frustrated and thinking: �what�s so bad with him not being challenged for a few years? If my son stays at grade level, and not challenged until taking advanced courses in Junior HS, won�t he have a better chance of �fitting in� socially?�

My question: Is it ok for him to be bored at Montesori for 4th and 5th grades, and then get challenged in the 6th grade public school, where they have gifted and talented math and English programs?

My son seems happy, so I�m thinking it�s ok to �hold course� with non-challenging work at Montesori for two years, but I�m wondering how big of a down side is there to my �hold course� thinking?

Any thoughts are appreciated. Thanks.

If he's happy in school and you can see a light at the end of the tunnel, I think it's fine.

But I would find a way for him to get challenged outside of his school environment. Sign him up for foreign language class, learn a musical instrument, take up a new sport, sign him up for online math curriculum. There are lots of ways to do it. Something that will force him to face a challenge on a regular basis. That should help make switching over to an environment where he's faced with challenge and actual work not quite such a shock!

Another vote for "if he's happy, I wouldn't worry."

By not challenging his gifts, when the time comes when he must do something that is difficult, he will balk at the attempt becuase it has been so easy for him for so long.

Gifted potential, like muscles, must be exercised so they can be used when called upon.

I also think it might be a good idea for him to undertake a challenging pursuit outside of school. But if he's happy I wouldn't sweat it too much.

Have you researched the sixth grade gifted and talented program? My fourth grader was MUCH better off last year at his Montessori school than he is in the "gifted" program at the local public. We will have to make a change for next year.

I vote for getting him involved in something stimulating (and challenging) outside of school, at the very least. Is there some sort of project that he'd find interesting? My son has been greatly enjoying Lego Mindstorms lately, and I think it's the sort of thing most kids would probably enjoy.

Oh - my 4th grader is obsessed with Lego Mindstorms right now too! Great open ended fun learning.

Hi - Here's a link detailing what kids don't learn when they are not challenged at school:
What Kids Don't Learn

While I agree that happy is good, I definitely would try to get your DS involved in something that will challenge him, and if possible, at the school level. I would worry that your DS might not think that school is a place for learning, and then when the chance to learn and be challenged in school does come up, it might cause some difficulties.

I agree with the other posters. If he is happy than I wouldn't pull him out but I would look to supplement outside of school. Foreign language, chess, music, etc ... all good examples. And the reason for the supplemental is to give him a challenge. We all need to learn the art of learning so when the time comes and the work becomes challenging you won't hit a wall.

I also agree not to assume the gifted program is that advanced. I would do a little digging and find out the curriculum. Do they spend a lot of time on review? Just because the program has gifted in the title doesn't necessarily mean it is all that advanced.

I agree with what's been previously posted here. One thing you might want to try is giving your DS some fairly challenging work/project at home that you know is interesting to him and that you're certain he could do given some time and effort, and then see how he reacts. For example, I would see it as a red flag if he has fits about not being able to do the work perfectly the first time, or that the project is "just too hard" or too much work. If that's the case, I would dilligently start looking for other challenging opportunities to consistently work into the routine.