Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Age or Ability Specific Forums Pre-school Went to check out a preschool today

I literally feel sick over it. I think I went pale when they were explaining what they were doing in class this week and, I think they took it as it was going to be too hard for DS. "They don't get into this [harder stuff] until 2nd semester." 8( It is so good to know DS can learn all about the letter Q AND patterns at this time next year! I really tried explaining things and it didn't go over very well. Yes, this is mostly so he can socialize and learn to listen etc. but, it is just ridiculous. Oh and it is "OK if he doesn't recognize his name written out at first".

I don't know what to do and NOBODY understands. I was trying to explain to DH last night that DS can't go to K for a year and a half and how ridiculously funny that seemed and he just didn't get it. I said "Think about what he knows now. Now add another year and a half on to that and stick him in K where he would be ahead right now." I think that made things a little clearer for him.
He doesn't even seem as highly gifted as so many other kids on here. I really don't know how you all do it. I am at my wits end!
I don't really have a question. I guess I just needed to vent. Thanks for 'listening'.

Can you find a preschool that is playbased and stays away from academics?

Yeah, I really thought that would be the answer but, I can't find anything. Even the daycares are 'schools' now.

I feel for you, I was in the same place a year ago. It's not easy. We tried 3 pre-ks in one year (long story) and I have to say the least successful with the totally play based/no real rules setting since there was no real structure, overwhelming and no opportunity for him to have any brain food there(the first one I tried). The most successful was Montessori and he had no behavior issue there(the last one I tried). The other program was okay in the middle. Not challenging at all, which caused some acting out and behaviors there...but he got to play and jump around and still was okay with it. Good luck. I am glad that is done with. Now the only challenge I have is the next however many years of school that is left to be an advocate

We went with a Reggio Emilia preschool and were very pleased with it. There is NO focus on academics it's all learning through play and child led.

The first year one of the boys loved rockets so they focused on that for as long as the interest was there. The kids learned songs about rockets, read books, made their own rockets out of craft materials, build a rocket 'fort' in the playyard, etc.

We aren't there this year as I couldn't swing being in two places at once - DS in K here, DD in preschool there (20 mins away) with not-cooperative start/end times between the two places.
This year they built a new sand play area, furthered the garden, have 2 chickens, planted grape vines on the trellis the kids built last year with one of the parents.

DD is actually not in school at all this year as I couldn't find a place I liked that was worth it after their old school!

Have you looked specifically for learn through play, reggio emilia, or even montessori(some would possibly be a good fit, others wouldn't)?

Check out any cooperative schools too, they are typically more play based. People don't understand that plenty of learning is happening when it's not 'academic' based and that there is no need to sit down and teach them academics at this age. They'll learn it through play far easier than structured learning. My kids would have been bored to tears in a non play based school - and even then my DS continued learning and is WAY ahead of his K class. He entered reading and is doing 3rd grade math all coming out of a play based experience.

I get that way too, it's our own OE's - we feel things so vividly. Plus it's disgusting that the needs of .5% of the population is totally invisible and unaccomidated.

Venting here is a great thing to do, and we totally understand. So glad we are here for you. And yes, it adds to our stress that we can't complain about this sort of thing with our local mom network.

DH will catch on ---- eventually. This is where time really helps. I've found out over the years that there are lots of ways to be gifted. Seeing into the future is one of my talents that DH totally doesn't get. He has party tricks that I can't fathom either. Make sure that DH gets lots of exposure to ND (normally developing) kids. But in the end, to some men, babies all look like 'babies' to their eye. I don't think that's what you are facing yet though.

Best Wishes,
Grinity

Are you looking just for socialization right now ? I know this doesn't help for the future, and Kindergarten, but if you want him in an away from home situation - have you considered an in-home (family) daycare ? They come in all shapes and sizes - and they DON'T all sit their kids in front of the TV all day (I know - I run a daycare, and we don't even have a TV here). The good thing about daycares is that they usually have a mixed age group, so kids are around older kids as well as their age peers. Just a thought.

i hear you and feel your pain...it is completely why DD is not in prechool nor will she be. there is no good fit here for her, at not 3 she is reading on a end of 1st grade letter and doing 1st grade level math.....learning to recognize letters and numbers and how to count will not work for this child. it is definitly really hard when you realize there is just no fit for your child. HUGS

Thank you so much for all the input/sympathy. I am feeling a bit better now (the knot in the stomach is almost gone, ha ha).
I am kind of on a weird side of town. You would think there would be a lot of options but, all the 'good' school are on the other side of town.
There is a montessori school here but, it looks a little weird to me. Not the montessori stuff but, the actual school building. I may go check it out anyway.
I am leaning toward just doing classes around like gymnastics (which he is already in) maybe do some gymboree stuff and children's museum classes. We have an awesome children's museum here in Indianapolis!
Thanks so much for all your help!

Think, too, of science centers, zoos, Sunday School (or similar) classes, summer day camps (some can be 1/2 day), historical museum camps, parks and rec sports programs, etc. There are tons of programs where your son can get socialization and time to learn both academic and non-academic things over the next 1 1/2 years. I know many K teachers tend to think that it is extremely important for kids to come into K having had a preschool experience, but if one day you get flack for not sending him, a variety of experiences where he participated without you always in the room should satisfy them.