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    #50489 07/07/09 06:02 AM
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    So DS is 4, he will be 5 in a couple weeks though. He has had the craziest behaviors the last month or so and I am unsure what is going on or what to do about it. I wish I could describe it. The biggest thing he does is he makes strange sounds and noises and says silly noises a lot, and will spit (usually as part of the noises). As in baba laba shaba (spit spit). It usually is just kind of sticking his tongue out and making a sound. But there are days where this goes on all day.....it almost seems like an impulse he can't control. But it hasn't been like this before so I am confused. He does tend to hum while he does things, but that doesn't bother me (although it may be an issue in school). He also has been screaming constantly pretty much every time he doesn't get his way. Like if I ask him to go to the bathroom he wines and says he doesn't need to and if I continue calmly and tell him to go he will let out a blood curling scream or yell "I don't need to". It is seriously driving us insane...and I am worried to death about school. Now he does these dumb behaviors with kids his age and even older, in fact it seems like he does it a lot more around his peers or his 2yo sister. Not much one on one with us at all. I just can't put my finger on it and I want it to end shortly because he is a PG kid that is skipping K and going straight to first. I don't want the to say this isn't a good move for him because he is socially immature or something. He hasn't always been like this and I don't know what is going on or how to end it. Any ideas? anyone been through anything remotely similar with their children?

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    I not sure exactly what is going on with your son but I thought I should share that my DS6 never had these type of behaviors until he started school. Now he does a lot more silly talk and a lot more screaming when he doesn't get his own way than he did when he was a toddler. He also started with a wierd arm motion that we had never seen before this year. These behaviors were mostly seen when he was around his peers and not when just one on one with adults.

    Like you, we were very concerned that there was something else going on with him. DS6 was evaluated by a neuropsychologist last week and we were told that he does not have any diagnoses besides some mild anxiety to go along with his PGness. Most of these quirks are just that quirks. There is also some aschychrony at work and he is truly just trying to cope with the world around him.

    My DS6's behaviors were worse when he started school, perhaps your son's behaviors will be lessened with the start of school.


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    crisc #50493 07/07/09 09:11 AM
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    Shellymos:

    Our DS turned 5 a couple of weeks ago. We do see crazy behaviors sometimes - not dissimilar from the kind you describe - but they haven't been as constant. In our case I think the silly noises are a different thing from the impatience and screaming. We also have the music in the background issue - our DS is constantly whistling - but since I do that too I can't really complain.

    I deal with the silly noises differently from the screaming. Screaming is something we don't tolerate. If it continues I threaten to take away something valuable to him - like his baseball glove - and that usually calms things down. But the silly noises I don't treat that way. One thing I've tried is just to join in. Make it a funny conversation. In our case it becomes a joint game that evolves rules of its own - rhyming rules or funny semantic association rules, for example. Usually he really enjoys playing it for a while, and once it's run its course he moves on to something else. Not sure this will work for you, but it might be worth a try.

    Good luck: I know these things can be very frustrating.

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    My DS7 has always gone through life making up his own soundtrack and sound effects--I think the only time he is silent at home is when he is engaged in something that is producing sound FOR him, or when he is reading a book. This has included nonsense syllables, baby talk (my personal "favorite" crazy)and pretty much any other sound you can imagine. It hasn't slowed down friendships any, and in fact I hear quite a bit of the same from his friends. I recall my DD and her friends also going through a baby talk phase in K and 1. As to the yelling....my DS has a pretty quick temper as well. However in 2 years of school, he has only ever yelled in school on one occasion (after which he burst into tears and sobbed for 20 minutes frown ). I had anticipated daily phone calls from school--we consider our DS to be a force of nature wink. He is strong willed, has difficult leaving an activity he is engaged in, and then of course there is the constant noisemaking.... His behavior at school is impeccable however. I think that kids can be very different at home and at school. My suggestion would be not to worry too much at this point. Until he is actually in school, there is no way to know how he'll act there. In the meantime, if you are wanting to start shaping behavior, you might respond to concerning behavior as a "coach", using comments like, "When you get to school in the fall, you'll find that students are expected to communicate in a quiet voice. Let's try that again".

    Taminy #50501 07/07/09 12:19 PM
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    My dd just turned 5 a month ago, and I see some similar behavior with her. She has recently created her own language which is part baby talk and part using the word "ma" over and over again. As in, "I-ma .. go to ma park ... ma hun-gee!" It is so tedious to listen to her talk. This is a child with an enormous vocabulary. In a quieter moment, I asked her why she talked that way and she said the "ma" meant me (Mom) and that she was telling me she loves me. She is a sensitive kid - and I think this "ma-talk" comes out more when she is anxious or nervous about something. Like she needs reassurance. So right now, we're working on keeping the "ma" talk at home and speaking correctly other places so other people can understand what she's saying crazy.

    Is it possible your son feels anxious about something? Perhaps the start of school?

    As for the screaming, your story reminded me of something a friend with a HG child told me just last week. She said her daughter became quite angry every time mom asked if she needed to go to the bathroom. Finally, mom asked her (again, at a later, quiet moment) why the girl got so upset every time she was asked to use the bathroom. The daughter said, "I don't like hearing the toilet flush. It's too loud." Mom was really surprised - not expecting that reason. So she asked the girl what they could do about it. The daughter said, "I'll go to the bathroom and you can come in later and flush after I'm gone." Mom replied, "And you won't throw a fit when I ask you to go, then?" And daughter said she wouldn't - and so far it's working!

    I'm not saying your ds has the same issue with the sound of the toilet. But I am suggesting, if you ask him, it may be something different than you think.

    Taminy #50502 07/07/09 12:21 PM
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    Thanks for the responses. It is a really strange situation. We decided to focus on screaming and spitting. For now we are ignoring the silly talk, other than reminding him to use words when he carries on (it's quite annoying because my 2yo DD talks great and he does baby talk stuff that she mimics). Oddly enough he has done none of it today (we are home from vacation today). It really isn't just silly talk, it is more than that. It is quite loud and carries on for a while. It is usually when he is antsy or excited (maybe even sensory overloaded) from what I can tell (or just wants attention). The screaming is new and quite annoying. Spitting I don't think he even realizes it sometimes, and others he thinks it is just funny. This morning I explained that it's got to stop and that every time he spits or yells about something he loses 10 minutes of computer time. (He usually gets about an hour a day if we are home all day). I explained that great days may even earn him more time. And if he has used all his time then I will take away TV (he usually only watches one or two shows a day). He loves computer though so I am thinking this will help. He yelled once today about something and I told him he lost 10. Later he did the spit thing once and I told him lost 10. I asked if spitting was worth losing 10 minutes of computer time and he said politely that actually it was. He is something. He has been wonderful today though. I wonder if some if had to do with school ending, things changing by being home all day now and not seeing grandparents quite as much (he stays with them while I work and I am off for the summer). I am hoping it settles down soon because he is really a great kid. If he could keep up like he is today....I would have no complaints. I am trying not to be too anxious about school. He has just never been around that many kids with only one teacher. I can't imagine how this will work. But I am hopeful.

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    If it is as bad as it sounds at its worse, I would get him an appointment with the pediatrician in case you need a referral, as soon as possible. If he had it before and it has worsened it could be a tic, obsessive compulsive behavior, or related to anxiety . If it came on all of sudden it could be possibly related to a recent strep infection, PANDAS. (Which is still being researched.) I am familiar with sensory processing disorder, but the behaviors described sound more involved.

    Have you asked why he is making the repetitions and spitting? For example, is he holding saliva because he doesn't want to swallow? He can't help it? He might be able to tell you why he does it. Etcetera.

    My PG kid's issues, different than your child's, started at 4/5. It has been an ongoing process finding help. It seems we go about 4 months of a year resolving something and a new thing pops up within one year. It might be helpful to have a pediatrician and a regular psychologist for when issues like this pop up. Trusting their professional judgment to make a referral is important.

    I hope it resolves soon.

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    Sometimes I do think he is trying to drive us crazy. DH does react sometimes when he carries on..but usually is pretty good. I tried redirecting him a lot which worked most of the day. It's always during an unstructured or uninteresting time it seems (at least the noises and the spitting). I have thought about it being a tic or something...but it's not that constant and he knows full well what he is doing and laughs about it. We have a psychologist who did his testing and met with him regularly for days...but he never did anything like that when we met back in March. She felt, and we felt, that he was advanced socially and very mature. He could still act goofy at times, but wouldn't do it during academic stuff at all. I do think its a phase, but a very strange one. He has had other little issues in the past that randomly resolve, so I am hoping this one resolves itself soon. Only time will tell.

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    Shelly,
    It sounds like you are on the right track. You know your child better than anyone.:) I hope it resolves for you.

    If you continue to be concerned, you might consider picking up "The Mislabeled Child" and seeing if anything your son is doing seems to resonate with descriptions within the book.

    Lya

    Artana #50536 07/08/09 10:32 AM
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    Shelly,

    My DS8 talks, sings or taps things to the extent that at times it feels constantly to me. He was always intense and physically likes constant motion but the weird silly voices started around 5 or 6 and are still there. Like you said he does not use this voice in conversation with me except rarely. Unfortunately he taps and talks and sings all through the school day as well annoying his classmates. He is also physically "rough". I don't mean aggressive or hostile just likes to bump and thump and hug hard etc. Add this to being several years ahead of them in most subjects and correcting them you can see that he didnt' win a ton of friends. On the other hand there were days when he had the whole class and teacher laughing with his antics. We are looking now at possible causes (ADHD, Sensory etc.) and also just about to start social skills/ emotional counseling for him to learn some tools/rules and to have an outlet for any emotional issues.
    He was diagnoses with Sensory Integration Disorder at age 3 and is considered a "sensory seeker" which might explain the physical stuff and perhaps the voices, who knows? I like you worry about the effects of all this on a kid already "different".
    And as a final note, as I type this he is in the other room talking like SpongeBob on Speed. Sigh.........
    Let us know how you make out. I sincerely empathize.


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