Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion I feel like im in over my head!!!!

When i was younger i wasnt aloud to talk about feeling/being different if i did i was told everyone is special in there own way (by my mom) and that everyone else feels/thinks the same way i do they just dont talk about it... so i learned to be quiet about this odd feeling i felt inside (like i was different and didnt fit in)i learned to ignore it untill...

i had kids and now i feel so lonely and isolated and like im back at square one only this time im being asked by sociaioty at large to ignore my kids abilitys and that them being what they are is not acceptable.... im scared to talk about it and when i do i carry such guilt around thinking why did i say that to my friend i bet she thinks im crazy/weird

then there is just everyday life with three gifted kids one who is a perfectionist (dd4) and crys and says "its all my fault mommy" when she makes a mistake and one that iv been told a couple times may be OCD (DS2.8) and is so sensitive and scared of his own shaddow (and everything else) and then the littleest (dd7mo.) who is into everything and took her first steps last week and insists on all things in life being equal so when the big kids get something like chips or ice cream she flips out till she has the same she does the same thing if they have shoes and she doesnt exe.

i never get enough sleep i feel really stressedc out and like i just want to scream WHY CANT I/THEM/LIFE JUST BE NORMAL???????

I've heard of this thing called normal and I'm SO glad I don't have it...

My best advice? Try to find a way to work it out with your partner, or someone if you are going this alone, to let you sleep in a bit while they get up with the kids. Also PLEASE find a way to get someone to shift you with the kids for at least a couple of hours a day.

My boys never stop. They are beyond intense. They exhaust me. This is my life. It will NEVER be "normal" no matter how much I wish for it. I learned to stop hoping for that (most of the time) and just revel in the high energy uniqueness that is existence with my boys. I've learned to look for beauty and strength in the things that would drive me insane if I didn't.

With kids like mine if I didn't MAKE time to take for myself I simply couldn't survive. I need that time for myself to be a better mom for them.

Sorry to hear you are feeling isolated. This forum is a great place to get some of that out, and talk to a few people, though it's not the same as calling someone up and saying, 'Our 7 month old just took her first steps!' and having them just say 'Wow, that's great!'...First of all, I'd like to say:
THAT'S AWESOME! Your kids sound both amazing and wonderful, and yes, with that comes exhausting.
I have wondered about ocd with our youngest, she is on a hand-washing thing lately, and I know that 'classic'; have too look into it more.

Not getting enough sleep can make even minor issues seem like the end of the world, of course, so that is great advice to get more- if at all possible!

There was a great, long, thread around here about parental isolation when you have gifted kids. The more gifted the kids, likely the more isolated the adults. It's odd, you finally start to find some like minded people when you get to college/adulthood, but then having a toddler who's reading suddenly throws you back out of the group.
It is hard to identify people whose kids might also be gifted and therefore fit better with yours, parents who themselves might be gifted, but you should check around for something like that locally, please check out SENG - supporting the emotional needs of the gifted. They may have a group in your area, and be just the thing.

This resource seems really cool, too, I have recently used it to find a chess club - you might search for local gt support group via http://www.meetup.com/
I have only used it once and the meet up was 'as described', but your mileage may vary.

Yeah that pretty much sums up how I feel too! I have a DD4 A DS2 and a baby. Some days it is really hard. I also get very little sleep.

It is hard to find support when your little ones are very intense. I get breaks from relatives sometimes but no one can handle them for very long. They are not bad, just very intense. It makes me feel a little better to hear others struggles watching them. Like Grandma getting frustrated with the constant questioning.

Watching three kids is hard. Especially when they are unusual in some ways. It is hard to explain to other people just what a day is like with three kids like this. I share your feelings. Sometimes I stand in my room and think this is just not normal.

Challenges come up for all moms but it is hard to explain. It helps if you can get time one on one with them. Two adults per one child works well. Do you have anyone who understands them that can give you a break? Do you have any friends with kids that are similar? Do you have things exceptionally well baby proofed? Hang in there. I wish I had better advice. I am trying to figure this out as well. I am sorry you are feeling isolated. Just know you are not alone.

Congratulations on your walker. Thats great! Your kids sound like a lot of fun.