Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Another meeting......

Hey everyone. Guess what? Time for another meeting for MrWiggly! Woo hoo! (read: sarcasm. I'm really getting tired of meetings and phone calls <sigh>)

On the plus side, the principal has just told me that they are going to give him the classroom aide to work with him in math one-on-one. This is great! She will work under direction of the junior high math teacher who had been doing instruction, but can't any longer due to MrWiggly's increased needs for direct teaching (she is teaching him on the side while teaching 8th grade math simultaneously!). MrWiggly is FINALLY at a good point in his math curriculum where he is challenged and learning!! But needs that adult there to actually be teaching!

On the negative side, the kids have been teasing him more. Just last night he told me that all the boys in his class were laughing at him for only being 7 years old. He retaliated with "I might be seven but I'm smarter than all of you!" Not sure that was the best response but at least he stood up for himself! Then he told me that a "true friend" wouldn't laugh at him about anything. Makes me think that a move to where he stands a chance of meeting a true peer is worth it, even if the school could end up meeting educational needs.

Wish us luck. I'll let you know how the meeting goes. It's tomorrow morning.

Go get 'em, Debbie! I'm sorry about the teasing, too. But I agree that standing up for himself is really key. It's a lot less fun to make fun of a kid who doesn't take any guff!

Great job on the math advocacy! I hope the meeting goes smoothly for Mr. Wiggly. I am also proud of him for standing up for himself and hopefully the kids will think twice before messing with him again.

good luck Debbie!

Meeting's done. It went well.

MrWiggly is doing very well academically. They have come full circle at the school and are now, I think, doing the best they can with what they've got. He started today with the new 1:1 aide for math. They want to use the Life of Fred books I bought and had been doing at home. They are interested in expanding their software to include some of the software we use at home.

The 3rd grade teacher has differentiated in reading by having his group move ahead in the text, so he is in a group doing higher level reading. She has added 5 challenge words to each weeks spelling test and sees him excited about those words (since he's already mastered the others on the pretest each week!). He participates in two different gifted pull out programs, one at his school and one at another grade school in our district. They all had good reports about his academic progress. Nice for a change!!

However, as the academics have improved the social/emotional stuff has deteriorated. He is now more aware that he is different. He is, according to the teachers, more noticeably different from peers in 3rd grade. They were concerned about his "aggression" with others (he shoved kids two days in a row right before Christmas break) but we brought up the bullying and teasing he is apparently enduring. They all got quiet and took notes.

Good news is the social worker is going to meet with him weekly AND do a classroom program on bullying and name calling. MrWiggly loves getting out of the classroom to chat with an adult, so he's eager to see her! Hopefully the teachers can address the teasing and stop that ASAP.

The one thing that bugged me was when the principal commented "we excpected social and emotional problems with academic acceleration." I was quick to point out that MrWiggly is having his problems with the 3rd grade NOT the junior high kids. It's keeping him back that causes the problems NOT accelerating him!! The social issues are because he is just different from all the other kids. He's not found a single friend that is a true peer. The bottom line is we need to keep moving forward on looking at other school districts for the sake of peers. MrWiggly is too extroverted to thrive here. He needs friends.

So, overall it was a good meeting. Advocacy has worked - his needs are being met better with each meeting we have. But the journey continues. I hope our story helps others just as everyone else's has helped me! Thanks to all of you for the support and encouragement!

Debbie,
Wow - great meeting and great counter argument to the 'expect social and emotional problems' thing! Go Debbie!

The longing for a 'true friend' is so tough. Keep looking for extracurriculars that might send one your way. Chess Club, etc. I have seen some benifit from the kinds of things that your school is suggesting, so I hope that they will help here.

You may have to stand in for a 'friend' in some ways, while you wait for the kids to catch up. Which can be sweet in it's own way - though difficult in others.

Love and more Love,
Grinity

Thanks for the cheers, Grinity!
I had not thought of asking about any extracurriculars for him. I don't believe that there are any for 3rd graders at all but perhaps they would consider him getting involved with one that might be appropriate for him even if with older kids. But I know for sure that there is no such thing as a math club, chess club, science club, etc. They have a scholastic bowl group but that is jr high kids. I'll have to check into it. Thanks for the idea.

It sounds like a productive meeting overall! It's great that the school is willing to individualize his education

3rd graders can be a tough bunch. I remember reading (on this board?) that bullying reaches it's peak for boys in 2nd/3rd grade. It's good to hear that the school is at least aware of the social issues...

My son participates in a pokemon/bakugan league. He is the youngest but the other kids don't seem to mind at all. As long as he knows the rules and is a good sport, it's gone well.

Debbie,

You've done a fantastic job advocating. I'm so glad it's been met with success in the form of acceleration! Congrats!

The social stuff is a little harder to peg down...((hugs)).

I don't know quite how you deal with the other kids except with how they are offering to have the social worker talk with him and talk to the class about bullying. Once kids see the adults won't let them them get away with that stuff, it usually dwindles pretty quickly!

Just keep talking to him, too. Just *hearing* him and letting him feel like someone actually *gets* him probably goes a lot further than him than maybe he lets on.