Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion I Need Some Perspective

In the early years, how big of a deal is it to be working a grade-level or two grade-levels ahead?

For example, when I look at a kindergarten workbook and a first-grade workbook, I don't notice a huge difference. And of course as an adult, it all looks easy. And I'm also a gifted adult, so trying to think back to what I knew when I was that age isn't an appropriate comparison either.

The main reason I'm asking is that I'm currently homeschooling DS5. Husband is not fully on board going forward and would like to enroll him in school next year. There's a part of me thinking that if I have DS complete a first grade workbook, it will be a sort of "proof" to hubby that he really is ahead. Though we have test results showing giftedness, DS isn't really the overachieving type, so I think it's hard for hubby to gain some perspective.

He's not yet reading, and I'm suspecting dyslexia (which is a whole different beast), but now thinking this, I'm starting to adjust my approach to reading with him. He also hasn't memorized the math facts, but he understands what's going on. But beyond these, I think his skills are a bit more advanced and that sending him to school would be a disaster.

So, I guess what I'm asking is if at this age, "working above grade level" really is significant.

In maths it's significant - but that doesn't prove school will be a disaster; it depends what the school is like. Rather than have him complete a first grade book, I'd be inclined to test him systematically and see what he can and can't do. One option - there are lots of others of course - would be to have him do (for free via a trial period) the initial assessment for ALEKS third grade maths (it does assess skills from the beginning, so this isn't something that would make sense only if you thought he was at that level). Then I'd ask hard questions of any school I was considering.

Thanks! That's a good start. An assessment is what I need. I also just found a local group that seems to be to support gifted kids in our (rather small) city, so I'm pretty excited about that. They'll be able to give me more info about what the schools have to offer.

My perspective is that an ability to work well beyond grade level at this age is a HUGE deal. It's an age where children are less able to tolerate boredom and repetition, and often leads to maladaptive coping measures: acting out on one end of the spectrum, depression and self-harm on the other.

My DD was on the latter end of the spectrum, and we had significant reasons to worry for her mental health if she was to remain in that educational environment... and so she didn't.

You need to meet your child at your child's level in order for them to feel happy in their learning environment. Sending this child to school may or may not be a disaster - you are only making assumptions that it will not work. There are a lot of good things about schools - things that get talked down when homeschooling is being touted.

I personally would like to homeschool but in our child's case, the benefits of the school environment far outweigh the benefits of learning at home. We make up for the lack of sufficient acceleration at school by afterschooling intensively and sending DS to a school that will accomodate his learning needs somewhat.
Since you would like to prove that your DS is ahead - you can have him take a placement test with Singapore Math or the EPGY Mathematical Aptitude Test. I remember doing these when my DS was 4 just to get an idea on where he was at.

As for listening comprehension, you can ask your DS to summarize and narrate an advanced book that you read aloud to him and show your DH the video of that narration.

Also, you might get some above age level logic workbooks from Critical Thinking Company or Prufrock press and have your DS complete some of their mind bender like puzzles to show his advanced reasoning skills.

It is hard to quantify the "above grade" performance for a 5 year old in all the other subjects like history, science etc. in my opinion. That will be only possible when they systematically study these subjects at a later age.

ashley has made some excellent recommendations already. DD4 is advanced in math and has completed 1st grade level math (on ixl.com) a few months ago and comfortably working on 2nd grade (conceptually knows even higher). She has just started to read but readingeggs.com estimates her reading age at 5.5 (for what it is worth) and she is making progress in leaps and bounds. Her school is not academically focused at all. Her teacher is not providing her challenging material at all. However, DD is very happy. She is partially home-schooled (1.5-2 days a week) so she is able to satisfy her academic curiosity at home. She goes to school to play with her friends, do art and yoga and drama and hands-on projects. I am planning to continue her there for kindergarten later this year. Maybe you can find a similar setup.

One grade level may or may not matter significantly, especially in reading. Many classrooms have kids reading 1 to 3 grades above "grade level," though this is less common early on. It's a bit less common to be ahead in math because most kids don't study math at home.

A lot depends on your local school system. It's hard to assess at this level, as you say. K12 placement tests can be helpful.

I would not be quick to assume that school will be "a disaster," unless the idea is that you want to homeschool anyway. Your child might like school and there might be more options locally than you know about. In a relatively educated area, you will find other kids (one to five per classroom) who enter K with some advanced abilities. "How advanced?" is the question of note. Personality is also obviously a factor.

Another example (but every child is different): I was told by preschool teacher than k would be a disaster. I didn't "hear/ understand" what she said. Ds went to k. K was a complete disaster. He was in the "high" group, but what they did was soo excruciatingly repetitive. Ds had a hard time understanding why the other kids didn't read or do math or whatever. (When assessed professionally, reading was end of 3rd, math end of 2nd- with no real exposure, play.) whether other kids were at that level, I'm not sure. However, that was not the kind of instruction he received at school. At that point, I really started after schooling to his interest; and struggled to get through.

(We were promised things would be better in 1st.) they are better, sort of- because the teacher is kind. Yet, not socially or academic

So, now, my dh and I are trying to decide what is best. (I want to homeschool.)

In sharing our experience, if you want to try school, it may work. Just have a back up plan if it doesn't work, have a back up plan. If you want to homeschool, go for it! Everyone here who home schools, seems quite happy!

Keep us posted!

I agree with ultra. There were kids with a huge range of reading and writing ability in our K-2 grade classrooms because of simple differences in when those individual children were developmentally ready to read/write. This includes significant differences among gifted children too

If I was in your situation, I would probably try school next year since your dh wants to. If it doesn't work out, then you'll both be able to see the challenges and issues first-hand, rather than assuming there will be challenges.


What type of workbooks are you looking at? I wouldn't put too much weight into the typical grade level workbooks you find at bookstores etc - in early grades in particular the work level can be all over the place, what is "2nd grade" in one book might be "K" in another. If you want to use workbooks, I'd take recommendations from homeschool parents - either ask online or friends you know or at a local homeschool bookstore if there's one near you.

One thing I like about using Aleks is that it will show you what your child has mastered as measured against your individual state standards (other programs/software/etc) may do this as well. That gave us a really good way of understanding (and proving to others) what grade level our children were working at.


If you suspect dyslexia, that *might* be a very good reason to actually put him into public school next year - to have the opportunity to have an experienced teacher give you input on his reading ability, to have him evaluated and possibly to have access to resources that will help him learn to read. You can request the eval even though you're homeschooling, but in some areas you might not have access to as many resources through the school district for remediation etc. Public school was ultimately not the best solution for my own 2e kids, but fwiw, it was really helpful for me to have had them in public school for awhile both for evaluation purposes and for learning about what their needs are. If you are committed to the idea of homeschooling but think that at some later point in time you are going to have to give public school a try (for your dh), I'd personally try it now while your ds is younger and while you're trying to get a handle on what's up with reading.

Best wishes,

polarbear