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I'm happy to have found this forum, as I'm new to this. I have a three-year-old (just turned three last month) who appears to be rather bright. I took the Talent Igniter online test, and it suggested my son might be Level Three gifted. At times it seems like, oh, of course, that explains so much...and sometimes I think that's crazy, and that he's just a typical kid. What is "normal"? I only have the one kid so I'm not sure what most kiddos are doing. He knows the alphabet, can write most of his name, counts objects up to 10, and is doing 35+ piece puzzles (honestly, 35 piece ones are way too easy; we've been doing more 60 piece lately). I'm having trouble getting a feel of whether we actually have a gifted kid, or if I'm crazy and seeing things that aren't there. This becomes an issue now because we have to decide where to send him for 4K next year. The elementary school we're slated for isn't very good, so we're considering private. Thoughts?
i'm certainly no expert on Ruf, but i feel like a lot of folks around here do ricochet between feeling crazy/normal/in denial a lot, especially when our kids are young. you're absolutely right to be wondering about finding a good environment for your DS' K year - i'm sure lots of people will chime in here with advice and help! and welcome!
Every Sunday it brooded and lay on the floor. Inconveniently close to the drawing-room door.
Welcome! Ruf's levels are controversial round here because they aren't properly evidence-based as far as can be seen; some people round here find they fit with other measurements of their children, others don't. So treat that with caution. Like many around here I'm among the worst people to ask about what 3yos can normally do, so I won't try to answer that part!
About schools, it depends what your options are. If there is a gifted school that is only good for gifted children or requires testing to get in, then yeah, you may have to make a judgement about whether that should be in the plan. But mostly, what you want is a *good* school and you want that whether or not your child is gifted. Good means things like: the staff care about the children; they treat them as individuals, and don't let traditions or rules stand in the way of individual learning needs; they encourage respectful relationships between all adults and children, and don't tolerate anyone being picked on for being different.
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I don't have much faith in the ruf levels though apparently they are skewed towards verbal. I estimated my son a 2/3 on the ruf levels (admittedly I only used the free stuff) when he is actually level 5.
I personally would look for a free play based preschool so he doesn't end up doing 2 years of learning stuff he already knows. Academic stuff can be covered at home. However I am biased as I live in a country where academic skills aren't taught until school at 5. On the other hand if there are gifted schools or you can afford a private school you think would be great now is the time to look round.
I'm having trouble getting a feel of whether we actually have a gifted kid, or if I'm crazy and seeing things that aren't there.
One thought is to move away from the label. It's all a sliding scale in a wide range of different intellectual skills. Kids learn best when presented with material they are ready to learn. So, if a kid knows the alphabet backwards and forwards, they probably are ready to learn letter patterns in words. If they can easily count up to 10, then they would proably like to learn to count to 20+ and then on to skip counting.
I've seen some more formal pre-K programs that list the skills they'll be working on. If they are beneath where your kid is at, keep looking.
One thing to consider when looking at a young child's level of performance or accomplishments is whether this is coming internally from the child, or the degree to which they may have been coached or pushed in their development.
Regarding the Ruf estimates, it is my understanding that they were developed with the population which was available to study... which translates to a relatively small sample. While it may be a great map of that group of children, it is often wise to be cautious when extrapolating to a larger population. There are several interesting interviews with Dr. Ruf on youtube. One example is:
I found Ruf to be pretty accurate for our son and some of her suggestions to be very helpful in understanding him, but he was older (6) when I read her book, thus more history to review/compare. Your child's personality has a lot to do with his fit for particular schools, so think carefully about that as well as how smart/advanced he is vs. others his age. I happen to have a child who is very polite from a manners standpoint but who doesn't sit calmly in his seat and listen to lectures on material he's already covered.
If it were me, doing it all over again, I would spend a lot of time visiting schools (meaning same school, seeing the classroom and most importantly, listening closely to what the adminstrators say when you describe your son... are they condescending? do they brush what you describe off? do they talk about how that might work or not with their program, etc.) Run like he** from rigidity. Look for places where he can advance as needed. Montessori, and by that I mean good, accredited Montessori schools with flexible teachers who get excited when kids learn and grow as fast as they can, can be a good fit, in our experience. It typically has mixed age groupings, which worked very well for both of our boys.
oh, yes! another vote for describing your son explicitly when visiting schools.
i was still in the denial phase when we chose DD's old school and i kind of glossed over her intelligence, simply characterizing her as "fun and interesting." i was so naive that i honestly thought a school that trumpeted its ability to differentiate for every kid would be prepared for mine.
ha! how wrong i was...
Every Sunday it brooded and lay on the floor. Inconveniently close to the drawing-room door.
I don't have much faith in the ruf levels though apparently they are skewed towards verbal. I estimated my son a 2/3 on the ruf levels (admittedly I only used the free stuff) when he is actually level 5.
I personally would look for a free play based preschool so he doesn't end up doing 2 years of learning stuff he already knows. Academic stuff can be covered at home. However I am biased as I live in a country where academic skills aren't taught until school at 5. On the other hand if there are gifted schools or you can afford a private school you think would be great now is the time to look round.
Everything Puffin said, except I live in a country where you have to seek out play based preschools. Ruf is just way off (I know many PG kids who still believe in Santa at age 7/8).
oh, yes! another vote for describing your son explicitly when visiting schools.
i was still in the denial phase when we chose DD's old school and i kind of glossed over her intelligence, simply characterizing her as "fun and interesting." i was so naive that i honestly thought a school that trumpeted its ability to differentiate for every kid would be prepared for mine.
ha! how wrong i was...
We were burned so badly on this last year, it still amazes me. Expensive private school, they knew he was way ahead from their own testing and could be a handful and yet... they accepted him and stuck him in the regular class with no accommodations, then played dumb and mean when we protested. The dumb one was the principal, who claimed our son wasn't gifted.
