Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Interaction with older kids, grade skip

Hello-

My dd10 was identified as HG at the age of 7. Right now, she is in the 5th grade. This child has a TON of psychomotor overexcitability, although this has improved somewhat in the past two years. We originally had her evaluated for ADHD at age 7, but they said it was just her giftedness. We accelerated her in math, but she stayed with her own grade. Administrators in our school corporation feel that she might benefit in a few years from going to high school early, at least for part of the day. This could possibly occur when she is a 7th grader, when she will "run out" of math at the middle school. We meet each year to discuss the plans for the next school year.

She is an extrovert. She has been involved in theater since the age of 6, and it has been a great outlet for her. She really fits in with the theater crowd. Currently, she is in a high school production. She is the only "little kid" in the show. The interactions have been interesting. I have noticed that the older kids really seem to like her, to a point. Then, her "energy" seems to eventually bug them. It reminds me of the pesky little sister. It does make me worry about a possible acceleration down the road. Will she fit in, or will she bug her classmates?

I'd like to hear from folks who have done a multi-grade skip, or partial skip, and how that worked for a kid who's only speed is 90 mph.

Thanks!

I'm not the mom of a grade-skipped child, but fwiw, I think it is going to be really tough to predict right now, at 7, what your dd's speed will be a few years down the road, and I'm guessing that the way high school-aged kids treat your dd now (as a cute little 7 year old who then becomes a pest) is going to be different than the way high school kids will treat a slightly-older dd who is with them in a classroom setting rather than in a theater situation. My advice would be not to over-worry about that at this point in time, and not to hold her back in what she is capable of re her math or any other subjects.

There may also be other options for how to feed her the advanced academics and math in particular once she hits 7th grade - online, for instance.

Best wishes,

polarbear

Sorry Polarbear, I should have been more clear. DD is 10 now, and acceleration to high school could be possible within a year or so.

She was identified at age 7.

Thanks!

Hmm-- well, our experience is that they (especially girls) change a LOT in the years between 9 and 13.

So that psychomotor OE may well evolve into something else by then, or be tempered by other characteristics.

My DD was similarly "pesky" or "barely tolerated" by older peers at this age-- and it has become MUCH improved in the past year or so as her physical maturation has picked up a bit. (She blends better visually, in other words.)

She doesn't really have a problem when the basis for a social activity is something that they can all participate in fully. For example, in theater, everyone has individual strengths, etc. In a group dedicated to community service, similarly, diversity is valued. Age doesn't dictate those things.

On the other hand, boys-boys-boys become a pretty big deal among girls who are middle and high-school aged, and THAT can be a real challenge for younger girls who just aren't into that scene (or for the parents of girls that precociously want to BE into it).

Your question is hard to answer. Each kid is different, and without knowing your daughter and her environment, it's impossible to give an answer specific to your situation.

To be sure I understand, you're you saying that she's going to skip all of middle school and go to high school next year (wasn't clear from your message)? Skipping that many grades at once could be a big deal emotionally and academically, but I don't know because I don't know your situation.

That said, there are some realities. For example, high school kids are partway through puberty and 11-year-olds aren't. High school kids are also a lot older than an 11-year-old and they won't forget this.

I would advise thinking very carefully about all sides of this possible skip or set of skips. What are the pros and cons? How would you weight each one? What's your daughter's opinion? What will you do about college? Etc.

Sorry Val- My original post was not very clear.

The school administration has suggested that by the time she gets to 7th grade (the year after next), our middle school may not be a good fit for her. They are known for being very inflexible. It was suggested that she could possibly be bused to the high school part time, but stay at the middle school for PE, etc., then for 8th grade be at the high school full time. The partial skip could provide a transition for her. So, it wouldn't necessarily be one big jump. I am grateful that they are willing to be creative to meet her needs. I just worry about the social aspects. And, maybe there will be some big developmental changes in the next year or so. I also worry about the boy situation... There are no easy answers! My youngest child is gifted as well, but is in the mild/moderate range. She is perfectly happy in her gifted classes and is much more comfortable in her own skin.

Another issue- I teach at the high school. This could be good, could be bad.